If you happen to see this sight, just slowly turn the car around and get the hell out. - 'Fodor's guide to West Virginia' —Mr. ?  |
| Float like a butterfly, sting like an elf. —Nyder |
| Oh for the love of God. Ok, listen. From now on, the first rule of Fight Club is you do not talk about fight club, the second rule of Fight Club is you do not talk about fight club, the third rule of Fightclub is You do not conduct Fight Club in broad daylight in the middle of the damned High Street! —Jacob |
| During the non-Christmas season Santa would raise money by touring hick towns and putting up Mrs. Claus in "All-Comers" fights. —Barking Monkey |
| Channel 375 Rumble in Saskatoon: McCormick vs. Douglas (Encore Presentation): $39.95 —James Howard |
| The Christmas episodes of Home Improvement were the worst ones, you're right. Jesus. —James Howard |
| The All New Card Sharks: Faster action, bigger prizes, more subcranial hematomas. —Under an Assumed Name |
| With no abortion clinics in the Yukon, the only reproductive choice in the neighborhood was a few stout blows to the abdomen from a husky lumberjack. —Rasputin |
| 50 bucks on the elf! —Mr. ? |
| And now, the float showing how this town was founded - when the lumberjacks fought off the native elves. —Mr. ? |
| I'm really into ice hockey and maple syrup, but I'll be damned if I can figure out those Canadian holidays. —dALY |
| It was nice that her family liked to participate in holiday traditions, but Jenny sometimes worried that they were celebrating Boxing Day all wrong. —haem |
| Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan are really stretching the limits of the romantic comedy these days. —haem |
| Tonight on CBS: background characters from Home Improvement battle for a spin-off. —Torc. |
| I swear, the Democratic National Convention gets worse every year. —anon |
| Brawny towels new "By my towels bitch, or I'll go upside your head" campaign was poorly received. —Under an Assumed Name |
| This is not what I meant when I said I wanted a pair of Christmas boxers —Entogal |
| Would make a lot more sense if they pulled the camera back so you could see the sign: DUI Boxing Challenge —Clever Screen Name |
| Um, when I can see outright about six things the Bible condemns and infer another four, this really stops being about Jesus, mmkay? —anon |
| I think if you go forward, back, back and then press the 'A' button, the elf spits a gout of Christmas flame and follows up with a Holly Jolly Death Beam —Mr. ? |
| I don't know what this is, but chances are it'll be running on cable every night for twelve weeks, with a cash prize for the winner at the end of it. —Nyder |
| A scene from 'Little Red Riding Hood' by Jerry Bruckheimer —Mr. ? |
