IADL #113
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 His plane was late, a baby with a funny hat had spit up on him, & 2 businessmen had kicked his ass for taking their picture, but when he saw that checkout lady again he knew it had all been worth it. Someday he'd work up the nerve to ask her out. --Spinnwebelos
 Martha tried desparately to establish a rapport with her customers. But no one had the heart to tell her that impersonating Chris Farlely wasn't the answer... --Paladinus
 If it weren't for the after-market generic Prozac, I wouldn't be the happy go-lucky cashier I am today. --who said that?
 (muttering) i hate my job.......i hate my job....... i hate my figure.....i hate the way i look.....i hate my life........i hate my life......i hate my life....... kill.......kill...... someone......please..... kill..... me..... kill.....kill....... --Timmy's Flat Rotting Colon
 It looks like Aunt Beru managed to escape the Stormtroopers after all... --Doc Evil
 WAITAMINNIT! Woolworth stores still exist?! --Doc Evil
 I'll see you 'hip' little college shits in hell, now take your precious Mountain Dew and get the fuck away from me. --The Troll
 They could buy her cigarettes, and they could buy her condoms, but they could never buy her dignity. She sold that long ago for a box of Ho-Hos and a Slinky. --ThreeSwords Delamitri
 One would think that Martha would have been more shocked to see her hand being chewed off by an angry customer. --ThreeSwords Delamitri
 Please, lord, don't let her do a price check on that issue of Almost Underage Lesbians in Heat! --His Imperial Majesty
 "Why no, I've never been called 'Woolworthless' befo... HEYYY!" --anon
 Oh, this shirt? It depicts the birth of Ahura-Nissan via the third eye of the goddess Shambleau, who will return to this dimensional plane in the year 2010 to establish the Millenium of Terrible Ecstacy!!! umm... that'l be $2.83, please. --not elsie
 "An' that'll be 29.95 for the Woo Woo..." --The Sandman
 This recently-discovered film clip shows why arch-villainess Woolworth Lady never made it to "Batman." --Emil Blovin
 "Sorry, kid. Can't sell ya these condoms... but here, have a pack of cigs on the house!" --Emil Blovin
 Bernice was proud. She'd finally worked her way up to stock clerk--at Woolworth's, yet! The other women in the trailer park were going to be so jealous! --The Lawyer
 I'll be damned. It's J. Edgar Hoover! --The Lawyer
 "Aw yeah...with these hip, artistic new 'off-balance' security cameras, I'm ready for MTV!" --nice personality
 Sure is a lot of anal douches, she thought --ChoppingBlock
 In moments of mild depression, Birdie carded herself. --ChoppingBlock
 Could you believe it? Six months ago, I was dancing in showers. --Riff
 From the 1950s classic Woolworth Cashier from the Black Lagoon. --Riff
 Yeah, they're gill slits. Where will you be when the polar ice caps flood the coast, eh? --Riff
 Martha continued mindlessly with her work, even as the HMS Woolworth leaned dangerously to starboard. --SoMuchForReason
 Damn, I should've applied to be a Hooters girl. --Pastor of Muppets
 I been smokin' cigarettes since I was 12 and it didn't do nothin' to my girlish figure! --Don Spudleone
 At Woolworth's we care -- from the smiling faces to the free handjobs. --Don Spudleone
 So THAT'S how Woolworth's stays in competition with Wal-Mart! Hiring the undead is a GREAT strategy! --Don Spudleone
 At night, Rosemary fantasized that she was the Woolworth Goddess! Dancing among the slurpee machines, wearing only the finest Rayon! But alas, when she awoke every morning, she was only the cashier at register #12. --Rev. Jason N Whitmore
 After repeated failures of trying to destroy Batman, Clayface decides opts for the fast-paced life as a cashier. --Don Spudleone
 Oh yeah, Ben-Wa balls definitely change the work experience! --anon

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