IADL #14
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 I wish somebody would tell me who my Account Manager is. --anon
 I can't help it, I am still confused by those Volkswaagen "Drivers Needed" ads. --anon
 Sure, Yah wanna have a smoke, and you end up in a damn dungeon! --anon
 Heeyyy, baby! Lookin' fine! My filthy park bench or yours? --Kurt L.
 "I think I got ripped off. This don't look like no goddamn French Riviera." --monkeyhead
 The 17th annual Michael Bolton Fan Club Convention. --Greg J
 "...but I would not FEEEL so all-ALOOOONE... Ev'ry-bo-dy must git... ah, scruit." --The Turtle
 All of her posessions in a plastic bag, Doris waited impatiently for the UFO to arrive and make her Queen of Venus. --Rev.Oley
 Before Rodin created his famous sculpture "The Thinker" he created a lesser work called "The Dolt" --Neil B.
 "J. Edgar liked to get his hands dirty with the day-to-day business of the Bureau. He particularly enjoyed stakeouts with vice squads." -- Hannibal Striker (FBI Retired), Mother Was A Red --Mister Sinister
 Unlike the other drag queens, Randy had a tendency to "dress down." --anon
 Once again Big Foot kept the National Enquirer from getting that clear quality photograph. --Kraken
 Though Neil Young has really cleaned up his life, there are still bits and pieces that he simply can't remember -- and, we suspect, doesn't want to remember. One such example: the Drag Years. --zeddy-mae
 This week on BENCHES, we take a look at the wooden-slat bench. From its humble, splinter-laden beginnings in the ninth century to the modern, ergonomically-curved benches that dot our modern landscape, the wooden slat bench has been a fixture known -- and loved -- the world over. We'll meet a woman who collects photographs of wooden slat benches, and an enterprising New York man who uses a wooden slat park bench for his desk, dining room table and bed! And our "Where is it now?" segment will follow up on the wooden slat park bench used in the memorable "box of chocolates" scene from "Forrest Gump". That's this week on BENCHES -- only on the Discovery Channel®! --zeddy-mae
 Roger was beginning to get discouraged. In six months of undercover work with the vice squad he had only arrested one man for solicitation; and he had gotten off with an insanity defense. --Blake
 The condemmned prisoners took a much more relaxed approach after the kommandant installed a more comfortable park bench on the firing squad range. --Capt. phealy
 Regina waited anxiously for her turn at the Raiderette tryouts. --Capt. phealy
 They think I'm crazy. But I know better. It's not me who's crazy! They are! Yes Hahahahahahahahaha! --jason
 The last picture taken by Pulitzer Prize winning photographer Edd Stenwicke as he was hit and killed by an errant in-line skater. --splatt
 I am pissed at life in general --anon
 Since it was his first public appearance as 'Edith' - the Prime Minister kept a low profile with heavy camoflage. --Keef
 Sitting on a park bench. Eyeing little girls with bad intents. --Jethro Tull
 Jesus was playing it low key until he could hook up with his posse. --Monk n Treb
 While Princess Di lived it up in Chicago, Fergie contemplates putting her head in the bag. --Monk n Treb
 The next person who quotes me Shel Silverstein's "What's in the sack?" is gonna get it in the sack. --Cosmo
 In a desparate attempt to give life to his floundering campaign, Bob Dole took to dressing like a "bag lady" to better understand the needs of the "underclass". --kafka

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