IADL #20
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 A fan broke through security and quickly took a photograph of the famous rock band known as "The Unknowns" --Bleach!
 Quick, there's Daddy's parole officer...slip him the envelope! --anon
 Hello, Miss... my, that's a lovely wrap you have...we're raising money for kids in ah Switzerland who can't afford to yodel... --anon
 "Lady, I know I'm only 10, but you got an ass that won't quit and I want it." --Don Spudleone
 "Hey, Podunk! Show us your Underalls!" --Capt. phealy
 Excuse me Ma'am, but what would you do for a klondike bar? --Cosmo
 "...and try new Hanes Lumpy®, in regular and sporadic-control-top." --zed o' the wilderness
 "But lady, I want to give you this tract, not shove it up my ass! Besides, I've already got six of 'em stuck up there by other people." --zed o' the wilderness
 Harold! Come back here and kick this little panhandler's ass for me! --anon
 "He looked like a parking attendant to me, it's not my fault the car is gone." --anon
 Sadly, even at age 9, Roy still hadn't been weaned. --Lack Tate
 No. You can't have any ice cream. Now hush up and look cute while Mommy scores herself a husband. --Der Tanzer
 Billy hated spending time in public with his parents. They had high paying jobs, were pillars of the community, and always treated Billy kindly. That didn't change the fact, however, that his father was a bald schmuck and his mother had a sponge for a head. --Der Tanzer
 I told you already. I'm not buying you a blow-up doll. You'll just have to share with Daddy. --The Lawyer
 Hurry up, Junior, we want to be first in line to get an application for the new K-Mart credit card! --The Lawyer
 Joan felt a sudden sharp pain in her lower back. She reached around with her left arm, but couldn't find the spot. "Oh well," she thought. "Probably just my lumbago." Little did she realize that before even reaching the K Mart, she would be lying on the pavement, paralyzed from the poison dart shot from the gun of an unknown assailant. --Jo Anne
 Straighten your misshapen body for a 10-spot, ma'am? --anon
 "Here we see, at just the moment before she collapsed, how the bullet penetrated just below vertebrae C17, then continued on to strike her husband's shopping sack. This accounts for the blood transfer, your honor." --The Sandman
 Bobby reflected on his lesson in science class that day, about genes. It looked like he had the choice of either a bald head or a big ass -- or both! -- by the time he hit 35. --Mister Sinister
 Here's a fiver - just get me a couple of 40's of Old Milwaukee and you can KEEP the change this time. --Keef

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