IADL #21
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 "Herpes? You got HERPES?! Man, nobody gets herpes anymore! Woo-hoo!" --John Hargrave
 Fed up with his co-worker's incessant jokes, Burt prepares to bludgeon her to death with a plastic Coke bottle. --John Hargrave
 Recounting last night's episode of "Seinfeld" while our customers writhe in pain. It's one more way you get your money's worth at Costco Pharmacies. --John Hargrave
 "Woo-hoo! Carl, give me another handful of those Demerols!" --John Hargrave
 You see, you switch the heart medicine with sugar pills...the savings are enormous! I've had no complaints so far! --Ollie
 Despite the popularity of the so-called "Coca-cola douche," New Coke II's vinegar and water flavor never caught on. --Capt. phealy
 So you hear it all over the store: "Mr. Miller, your estrogen is ready." He darts over here like a weasel, signs the first paper he sees, and runs off leaving me with change for a $20. The Rogaine guys aren't anywhere near as fun. --Horselover Fat
 On the next ER: Michael Jackson cries as he discovers he can't get any more white than he already is... --Cosmo
 They tried and tried, and even after the "Coca-Cola" treatment, the vet could not get Fluffy alive. --Cosmo
 And I told her that, of course, those douches were disposable, who'd wanna' keep one? --The Most Rev.Oley
 Whoop, there it is! Whoop, there it is! Whoop, there it is! Whoop, there it is! Whoop,... --Dark Roger
 "So then she told me to shove it uop my ass so I got out the largest hypodermic needle we had... --Cosmo
 "So, you're saying twenty bucks if I can get the entire bottle into my mouth? Piece o' cake." --zed o' the wilderness
 "...so then she says, `Will there be any harmful side effects?' and I say, `Yeah, normally this stuff makes you really, really ugly for about a week, but you probably won't notice a difference.' and she got all pissed off! So anyway, I need you to give me a hand picking the lock on the Comment box." --zed o' the wilderness
 "What's the big joke?" Warren wondered. "All I did was ask for Suppository Placebos. I don't even know what that means." --zed o' the wilderness
 The day the "Employees Must Wash Hands Before Returning To Work" sign finally came down from the restroom wall was a day of much rejoicing for the entire staff. --zed o' the wilderness
 "Now see here, ma'am, how Frank is choking and coughing and turning kinda blue? That's what we mean by a harmful drug interaction." --zed o' the wilderness
 Pictured above is a glimpse of how the world would be if pharmaceutical companies had their way. Here we see Enda about to get her prescription filled. She feels safer getting real Coca-Cola instead of the generic brand of "cola" which is priced 50% less. --anon
 Top waffing!! A case of "Bwo-job cwamp" is not a waffing matter!!! --Orion the Hunter
 So the kid comes up and asks for some rubbers, right? And I know we got 'em right under the counter, ya know, next to the tampons an' stuff, but instead I get on the PA and go, "This is the pharmacy counter, can we get someone to go in back, see if we got anymore 'Rough Riders'?" And so everyone's all lookin' at him an' shit.... I thought he was gonna pee himself right there in the store. --anon
 Ha Ha Ha, and when he asked me which aisle he could find disposable enemas, I just pointed to the Coca-Cola Display.. Ha Ha Ha , and he actually grabbed a six-Pack!!! Ha Ha Ha Ha! --anon
 ...and so just because she's bleeding to death, she expects me to treat her without proof of medical insurance! Ain't it a hoot? --Kurt L.
 "Doctor, this is odd. That urine sample had a very high concentration of caffeine, artificial flavoring, and caramel color." --Dr.P
 This is the medical and office staff of the Facial and Plastic Surgery Group. Ironic, isn't it? --anon
 Now c'mon. Don't be so bashful. You're great! Just right along with me: Doe, a deer, a female deer! Ray... --Der Tanzer
 Oh my God! It's incredible! What did you do, just take it from the side and comb it right over? Amazing! Ooh, you handsome devil you! --Der Tanzer
 "Nurse, did I get all the blood out of my hair?" --anon
 As Dolores graphically described the length of her new boyfriend's penis, Robert bowed his head in utter jealousy. --The Lawyer
 As Dolores graphically described the length of her new boyfriend's penis, Robert tried to hide his embarrassment that he, too, had first hand knowledge of Spike's manliness. --The Lawyer
 Nitrous oxide party at the CVS Pharmacy. --Bill Fortier
 ...I couldn't believe it. I mean what's a 75 year-old guy going to do with a 12-pack of condoms, use'm as balloons? --splatt
 No...hawhawhaw...no...the best part was when he told you he'd been taking 2mg 200 times a day.... --anon
 And then I said, "That's a rectal thermometer!" --Rob Martin
 Pharmacists laughing as only pharmacists can at the latest "Benzotriotylemine" pun... --The Sandman
 Rob learned a valuable lesson that day: Never ever ever get your persciption filled just after your pharmacist's office party. While the workers hooted and hollered, he could barely stand up. He needed his pills, dammit! --Mister Sinister
 Tonight on Fox, Wilford Brimley and Rosie O'Donnell star in the premiere of the new hot night-time soap, "Urology". --Mister Sinister
 Dr Eisenberg is entertained by his assistant's lunchtime imitation of a horny moose call. --el Marko
 So then I told her, Jolt will do the same job as the insulin, but for half the price...and you can re-use the needle! --Keef
 "And then, when I realized that Mr. Gowers had accidentally put rat poison in the capsules, I waited half and hour and called the cops. And now I own the whole damn pharmacy! --Capt. phealy
 Everyone at the pharmacy enjoyed the "Ex-Lax in the Coke bottle" gag. --Capt. phealy

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