IADL #263
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 Rule number one: Never, ever leave your jumbo jet unlocked when you park in the projects. --RipperJak
 Strapped for cash, American Airlines decides to scrap in-flight movies and instead re-forms Menudo. --The Village People weren't available.
 Highlights from the American Airlines marbles tournament --Roach
 Due to cuts the American Airline Christmas party was not as good as years past. --R.J.M.
 "Maybe we should change the name of our sorority before they make us carry luggage again..." --Argh
 A sign of the times: corporate sponsored chick street gangs. --Namgubed the Merry Elf
 Predictably, when American Airlines merged with Up With People, disaster resulted. --DoomTrout
 "Okay, now you go up to the plane like an employee. Sneak into the cargo hold and three hours later you're across the border looking for work." --plainpeanut
 Runway breakdancing was always a hoot until someone got hurt. --ChoppingBlock
 Alcoholics Anonymous take their "family" atmosphere a little too far. --R.J.M.
 Cindy handed over her wallet, exchanged a handshake with each mugger, and walk off. "That's the nicest gang I've ever met!" she thought to herself. --Magus
 Another frozen chunk of human waste falls from a Boeing 737 into Queens...time to call in the crack American Airlines 'PooperScooper' team! --Tillman
 In this scene from Honey, I shrunk the jumbo jet, workers try to refuel the microscopic plane with an eyedropper as others load it with inedible food. --Emil Blovin
 FBI agents on a stake out, disguised as American Anthropologists on a dig in central New York. --thoth
 Awesome airline employee perks!! --Namgubed the Merry Elf
 Between the Cryps and the Bluds, the Honeybees just didn't seem to fit in. --Riff
 In this modern world, street gangs have corporate sponsors. --RipperJak (Where political correctness is an oxymoron)
 Ill Advised Ideas: Oct 17th 1997 -- High visibility Alcoholics Anonymous jackets are distributed to members so they can recognize each other in a crowd. --Kwang The Almighty
 The "Female 18 and under" section of the Mile High Club had been enthusiastically welcomed by the staff of American Airlines. --leek
 The American Airlines crash-denial team manages to recover the last bits of wreckage and brain tissue; soon the bystanders will wake with short-term amnesia and a slight headache. --Paul Roub
 As a celebration for another successful flight, the American Airlines stewerdesses fill a pinata with mini liquer bottles and drunkenly scramble for them in the dirt. --the skyclad answer
 Alcoholics annonymous tests its members by pouring premium gin on the ground and seeing who goes to lick it up. --the skyclad answer
  After the crash of American Airlines Flight #256, the FAA determined the fault lay in the short attention spans of their experimental pre-teen ground crews. --Raven
 "Snake eyes! Damn! One more game, huh? Oh, the plane'll wait, trust me..." --Thany
 Naturally, a team came out to investigate: Just what really happened that caused Billy's model airplane's RC input device to explode, sending it plummenting to the rain gutter below? We may never know.... --Jamey "Silly Cow" Powell
 Let's stay out of this neighborhood. This is the turf of the Aardvark gang. --anon
 As if regular mimes weren't bad enough, now we have 'Formula 1 pitstop' mimes. --Geoduck
 We need ThunderZord American Airlines Stewardess Power now! --Jenn "Divatox" Dolari
 "Are you sure? I've been to other A.A. meetings and I could swear that Get to know your fellow members as dogs know one another was not one of the Seven Steps. --Dr. KNob
 We're American Airlines - something special in the gutter! --Medea Bunkmesser
 And now please welcome the American Airline Baggage Cart dancers, guaranteed to make every flight much more enjoyable! --toade

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