IADL #268
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 Friends, Romans, cornstalks, lend me your ears! --Werehamster, risking the red asterisk.
 After a night of drinking, Gulliver destroys the rain forests near Lilliput. --Mr. Ben McClellan's IADL invasion!
 When Martha Stewart drinks too much cooking sherry, she'll sniff anything or anyone... --Tillman
 Peggy and Marla seek alternative accomodations due to the overwhelming customer response to the Chili Caliente Buffet. --Dr. KNob
 "Yes, everything in this bundle of straw seems to be in order, and...wait, come back with that you punk kid!" --JimSalabim
 "Tonight on Ellen: The laugh's abound as Ellen's unexpected diaherra discharge in the middle of a Mojave restroom cause special guest star, Michael J. Fox, to skeedaddle to the nearest Andy Gump!" --helen keller, ABC Sweeps Week Programmer
 Can YOU guess the location of the dog that was airbrushed out of this picture? --Magus
 Hmmm...tastes like chicken.... --agm
 So this is what goes on in the executive washroom ... --Riff
 From the back of a "Highlights for Adults" magazine - find the phallic symbols! --Riff
 Little did the sodomists know that Wickerman was hot on their trail ... --Riff
 Man, this is the last time I eat a pastrami sandwich before going to bed! --Riff
 Bless me, fern, for I have sinned ... --Riff
 They no longer had wills of their own. They would do as the cigar smoking cornstalk commanded. --Treb
 Hiring the bulemic, and the terminally diarhetic had its disadvantages. --Treb
 A punchbowl, a little epicac and suddenly a boring office party becomes a 'laff-riot' --Harry Feltersnatch
 So, Timmy, were you born a midget? --anon
 Oh, and I'll miss you most of all, stunted Scarecrow! --Not Dorothy, but Dot
 When a body meats a dwarf, comin' through the rye... --anon
 Listen up, you little half-man bastard. If I catch you peeking up the skirt again, we're going to see just how far I can toss you from a crosstown bus. --anon
 The scarecrow, the tinman, and the cowardly yuppie. --Emil Blovin
 Above: cultists leave offerings to the Philodendron of Preservation, which they believe will avert the ending of the world this coming August. --Thany
 CHILDPROOF LIGHTER FOILS PETA PROTEST AT FUDDRUCKERS --Norm DePlume
 007 regretted the loss of his coat, but it was necessary to blind his attackers long enough to impale them on a handy potted yucca plant. --Stealth
 Bill barely escapes with his life as the tree people from outer space devour his unlucky date. --plainpeanut
 Jenny liked dating the potted plant, because it never talked back, never cheated on her, and sex was wonderful! Besides, she could kill it if she got pissed off and never have to face any legal charges. --toade
 Quasimodo's long lost sister: Quasipenelope, Keeper of the Big Straw Person Thing. --toade
 Bowing in humble obeisance, Jenna chanted three times, then struck the match to the Indoor Burning Man, symbolically igniting a years worth of trouble and woe. Carl takes the opportunity to get the hell out of the building. --Generik
 Lightning-fast, Ray grabs Susan's full, firm buttcheek and streaks out the door before she even has a chance to straighten up. --Generik
 At the International Deep Knee Bend Semifinals, two unidentified contestants take a moment to practice their technique. --Generik
 Gee Honey, you're right. That was quite the flatulation! --anon
 It's the Wicked Witch Of The West in a Miracle Bra !!! Run! Run! --not elsie
 Courtney demonstrates how she got her first big break in the record industry. --Flubber Indemnity
 "Don't worry, kindly photosynthesis eating creatures. My mystic flatulence will cover us with a field of invisibility until I can think of a way of freeing you from these damn vegetarians." --helen keller
 "Honey, ouch, okay,ouch. You said you'd blow me when I'd shove my head into a bunch of cacti. Ouch. Honey? Honey? Ouch." --helen keller with a new dating tip for gals!
 In the lesser-known mythologies of Liechtenstein, Munz Wehr, the god of cheap sportcoats, sprang fully-formed, if backward, from a potted plant. --The Outsider
 I think I saw this on Benny Hill once. --Microman
 Chez Bulimia --Microman
 It was never too difficult to hide from Gary. --Namgubed the Merry Elf
 Some girls just really dig faggots. --DieLifeDie
 Jane tries to entice possible mates in rather obvious ways. --Anonywuss
 Is the blond woman A: Sniffing her friend for reefer smoke B: Breast-feeding or C: Getting her ears cleaned? Your call! --Roach
 Wow! The lost footage of "Woman Puking Into a Palm!" And letterboxed! --schlitz
 Yes, there is a career to be made as a "Human Hot Wheels Ramp!" --Ravecavy
 Bill desperately tried to flee the room before his wife Betty let loose with one of her infamous "cabbage farts". --R.J.M.
 Ill advised ideas: December 7th 1985 -- Haystacks sporting hefty erections were placed in hotels and bars at the entrance to the restrooms. --Kwang The Almighty
 The Psychic Fern bends another to its will... and feeds. --DoomTrout
 "Mister Edson, we need to discuss this 'indoor dope crop' project of yours..." --Kitsunesan

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