It takes a REAL man ta carry his blankie out in public! --Kitsunesan
After being released after many years of productive service to his Columbian benefactors, Juan Valdez is finally free to feel the soft cotton of a woman's nighty against his skin with pride. --munkiman
"Third floor, secret laboratory, mallrats, transvestite cowboys..." --from The Milwaukee Horror Picture Show --Heath
"Okay, so I whip out the pistol, pull the trigger, and run away. No, wait, or is it pull the trigger, run away, and whip out the pistol? No, maybe I run away, whip out the pistol, and...." --Magus
"Whenever I'm beginning to gain some faith in humanity, I just stop on by the IADL. After only five minutes, everyone's an idiot again. Thanks, SpinnWebe!" -- Testimonial #261 --Bucky
Where have all the cowboys gone? Not here, obviously. --Medea Bunkmesser
Sadly, Fred looked at the empty space where his beloved alternative lifestyles store once stood. --Mr. ?
His list was almost complete. All he needed was an Easy Bake oven and he could return to the 'mothership' --Mr. ?
So what if I'm a gunslinging Caballero, I still want these Laura Ashley sheets. --ChoppingBlock
Coming in summer '98: Cheech Marin in Zorro: The Effeminate Blade --Doc Evil
Pancho Villa meets Georgio Armani --anon
A "Still" from a rarely seen Fantasy Island starring a young and nubile Juan Valdez. --anon
"Oh god. Is that Sheila? Oh no! She can't catch me buying dresses!" --Magus
The Klingon spy needed a refresher course or two before he could blend in with Earth's populace. --DieLifeDie
The new Cannibal Cafe in the mall is such a great deal. Not only are the little girls filling, but you get to keep their charming little pink windbreakers. --LadyJ
Roger clutched the breastfeeding weasel tight. The stares he was getting only made him more protective. --E_B_A
Clutching a child's blood soaked jacket and staring wistfully into the distance, is not, repeat NOT the best way to meet chicks. --DieLifeDie
Yee-haw, buckaroos! Wanna see me tame a wild escalator? --Riff
Man, the budget on these "Alien" movies just keeps getting lower ... --Riff
Hopeful despite the enormity of his quest, Prince Juan began the search for the mysterious Strip-O-Gram beauty who would fit in the dress she left behind at his birthday fiesta. --Dr. KNob
Rolando passed his days in the terminal, playing rousing games of "What Do I Have In The Blanket" with passers-by. --Geoduck
No captions available for this picture... Heck, no captions are NEEDED for this picture! --Doc Evil
Neither rain nor snow nor impending sex-offense charges hamper the quest of Lonesome Cowboy Bill for his one true love... --The Interrupting Cow
"I am Antonio Banderas, and I will hold your child's coat so they will not get hot while malling." --twomp
Those moving stairs on the way to the clothing store had left Billy Bob pretty shook up, leaving his fashion judgement in total disarray --mutantdog
There's nothing sadder than a pimp with no bitches. --Stealth
Thank heavens my crinoline arrived! I'll be the belle of the 'Long, Tall Texans' ball! --k.d. lang's kid brother
Gentlemen, our attempts to crossbreed Speedy Gonzalez with a professional wrestler have been a complete disaster. --Azazael
Black cowboy hat, red coat, pink jacket. Talk about conflicting signals! --Emil Blovin
"You are TOO Stacy Keach.. Stop pretending you waiting for your wife and kids to come out of Sears and sign my autograph book. Hey! Lily Tomlin! John Woo! Wait up, guys!" --helen keller, Starstruck
Early phases of Mr. Gonzalez' agoraphobia therapy allowed the use of his favorite blanqueta de seguridad. --Ngoc van Trimble
John Wayne's younger brother...otherwise known as "The Dork". --R.J.M.
...it's fun to stay at the M-A-L-L... --R.J.M.
...I'm proud to be an Okie with a blankie... --R.J.M.
Most cowboys liked to get 'likkered up' and shoot up the town between drives. Rudy, however, liked to accessorize --Harry Feltersnatch
Would somebody please 'out' this guy and put him out of his sexually confused misery? --Harry Feltersnatch
Many malls now have Mall Cowboys to help keep the consumer herds flowing smoothly. Strays are driven back into line with towel snappings. --Shem
The grinder accident had left Juan Valdez crippled and bitter. Unable to continue his job representing Columbian coffee he was forced to beg at airports. Ironically this proved to be more lucrative and some Krishnas provided him with a nice stump cozy. --Off my lithium
"So it's The Gunfight At the O.K. Corall except it takes place in a mall and the Clantons are replaced by some Chinese kids and Doc Holiday is played by Dick Butkiss. I smell Oscar!" --helen keller
"Now where did my little love-monkey go?" Ernesto scanned the crowd at the mall, sure that a naked 8-year-old couldn't get far even in a mall this big. --Generik
His hand safely ensconced in a warm baby blanket, Emilio defiantly gave the finger to every single passerby in the Hillsdale Shopping Center. --Generik
"Yeee-hah! Pink chiffon!" --Big ol' Bob
Drug dealers always judge each other on the quality of their linens. --Rev. Jason N Whitmore
Fuck Waldo. Find the man with the 357 magnum. --Not for the faint of heart
In a tragic moment, the Marboro Man holds his coughed up lungs tenderly before collapsing. --Mr. ?
Of course, this is not authentic Western dress. A real cowboy would be wearing an ascot as well. --Shem