IADL #315
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Scan supplied by Pastor of Muppets

 "I told the damn super in 1593, but NO, he had to fix Mrs. Antonioni's aquaduct first. I haven't even seen him since then. Hell, I'm leaving Pisa soon anyway." --Mycroft
 For some strange reason, just as Godzilla was about to crush the life out of her, Maria couldn't help but gaze admiringly, yes even longingly, at his impressive genetalia --Dog Matic 2000
 ...and in Brooklyn, they've substituted groundhogs with Maureen. If the hall lights aren't working, she goes back into her apartment, and there's two more weeks of winter. --phil
 Nice little lean-to you have here. --Doc Evil
 Why don't you come into my apartment... if you're so inclined. --NME (groan)--
 This must be the Leaning Tower of Peoria. --Heath
 God tells Rita that rent is due the 1st and 15th of each month. --Treb
 Welcome to the studios of WZLZ -- Chicago's only 24-hour dyslexic TV station! --Smokey
 "Land Shark?" Meg mused, "I don't know any "LandShark." --Opie
 Shows how far you can go if you've got the inclination. --Namgubed the Merry Elf
 "Death? We gave at the office." --LadyJ
 "Hmm... Well, it's W-575, but it sure doesn't look like someplace to be a holding a taco revolution." --Dr. KNob
 Today, the IADL photographer will be Harold the drunken Dwarf. --RipperJak
 Despite the success of the original, 'Alice in Closet Land' did poorly until it was remade into a NC-17 movie. --Mr. ?
 The Heinz Co. resorts to subliminal advertising and sneaks in a '57' wherever it can. --agm
 If you turn this photo upside down, the numbers clearly spell out the initials S.L.S.M.--which obviously stands for SoyLent Storage Module-- thereby proving without a doubt that this is the doorway to the Impossible Zone! --agm
 "Publisher's Clearinghouse? You guys don't look like Ed McMahon and Dick Clark." --Sean Q
 SMILE...you're on crooked camera... --R.J.M.
 Sensing danger, the greater spotted field cheerleader, or "Tonya," flashes her teeth. --Nervous Tick
 W575?........You sunk my Battleship! --Opie
 A scene from the old, campy Batman series: the episode where Catwoman finds Dick Grayson's rent-controlled apartment. --Crack Baby
 She thought about taking the apartment, she really did. After all, it had a spacious kitchen, a beautiful bedroom with a view of Central Park, and free utilities. But, the 45 degree tilt of the building did cast doubts into her mind. --Eli
 Natalie Merchant, having forgotten the syllable count for a haiku, happens on some handy inspiration. --Stealth
 "As I gazed into those eyes I knew I had met my soul-mate. She said, "Are you the pizza dude?" I said, "Yes. And I have your veggie supreme." Then, she let me in. Excerpt from "Hot Loins and Stringy Cheese - The Confessions of a Domino's Driver" On sale at an airport somewhere... --Tillman
 As the elevator fell fifty stories to its gruesome destruction, Cheryl's last though was, "With a weight capacity of only 575 pounds, perhaps letting Rush Limbaugh get on was a bad idea." --Emil Blovin
 When her apartment started to get up and walk away during a full moon, Susan finally realized it was a werehouse. --ChAoS
 A photo from Spinn's trip to the inclined plane. --ChAoS
 Ssh! I can hear two couples devouring each other ... a guy licking his own foot ... two dorks watching animal porn ... and a wild pillow fight to the death going on in there! Nothing unusual - let's check the next room! --Riff
 Welcome everyone to the many horrors in the Slanty Shanty. Here is Feera, the face with no body! --Mr. ?
 W 575?! If you're that far uptown in Manhattan, it's gotta be a bad neighborhood! --Riff - Yeah, it's a cheap ploy. Sue me.
 Betty. You gave up the car, the trip, the sterio and the washer and dryer to see what's behind door number W575. And behind the door is... IADL! I'm so sorry, Betty. Thank you for playing. --Mr. ?
 ...And just as the littlest pixie approached the strange new object and touched it in wonder, a mighty kick sent it (not to mention her) flying right over the goalpost... --Desscribe

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