IADL #33
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 Jerry Lee Lewis day at the GnawBone, Indiana K-Mart was a rousing success. --The Most Rev.HolyOley
 They walked the aisles in vain, hoping to find a 43-year olds body to match Brenda's head. --anon
 Wait -- the Muzak version of "Head Like A Hole!" That's the secret signal for Pasty White Guys everywhere to start Helter Skelter! --Trism
 The Candyman mixes it with love and makes the world taste good. After that, he rounds up the gullible sugar freaks and sells them on the black market. --Don Spudleone
 In Paris, they show off the finest in world's fashion; in Branson, Missouri, they show off whatever the hell they want. --Don Spudleone
 Dorothy already knew that this wasn't Kansas anymore, but she couldn't figure out which mentally defective character she was with on this leg of the journey to the Emerald City. --Don Spudleone
 ...And here we see the North American White Trash Monkey with its young in its natural habitat. This way to see the Elusive Brillo-Headed Suncoast Junkie, folks. --Don Spudleone
 So you see, kids, the drive to reproduce is so strong in some species that it doesn't matter who the partner is. The important thing is that the genes are passsed on to future generations... unfortunately so, in this case. --Craig
 Let's see, we'll need this duct tape, wires, a timer... Who would have thought that building a pipe bomb would be so complicated? --His Imperial Majesty
 And here, undercover Arkansas State Trooper Zeldo Mudd "procures" yet another "date" for then Governor Clinton. --kafka
 Coming down the catwalk at Orchard's Annual Father-Daughter Fashion Show are Bill and Marla Dickerson, sporting that awesome look, "Laundry Day". Spectacular!! Look at Bill sash-say down the walk with that fabulous Duct tape accessory! And Marla, her sexy walk accentuates her modern attire. Work it, girl!! --a little dwarf from another place
 Hey, who are we to judge as long as there's love? --Der Tanzer
 In the Shawasshit, WV, production of "The Wizard of Oz", prior to the strep throat outbreak, no one ever questioned the wisdom of having Janice the Munchkin as the understudy for Dorothy. --anon
 Lester hoped his daughter's appalling stench would distract the clerk from the fuel pump he had stuffed in his pants. --Ngoc van Trimble
 Look, I'm just trying to buy some school shoes for my daughter. Can you all just move along to cartoon#34 and leave us out of your sick little world? --Greg J
 Three more aisles and we're done with our excercises, porky. --Bloodshot
 Forrest Whittaker never really recovered from the blow to the head he sustained while playing the Giant in 'Jack and the Beanstalk.' --Keef
 "My Momma always said, "Life is like a shoebox. You don't want to open it, and when you do, whatever's inside stink like shit." You remember that, dear." --Evil Ed
 Unfortunately, Roman Polanski's disguise wasn't enough this time. --Evil Ed
 The strange, puzzling, yet oddly poignant relationship between Linda Hunt and Lou Ferrigno. --The Sandman
 "Sadie Hawkins Day" was always a big hit at the Buttonwillow Auto Parts Emporium and Cafe. --Capt. phealy
 I get all dressed up and where do you take me? Sears hardware, as usual! --Soma

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