IADL #335
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 You were right, blind dates are much less awkward and nerve-racking when you have sex before you go to dinner. ---Colon Bowel---
 "Stunned, I realized that she was eating her lo mein with one chopstick." --from My Dinner With Andrea --Heath
 "Dr. Stevens, logic dictates that nutsaks, while important to the final outcome, are NOT the only catalyst needed to produce the frenzy that often accompanies dik play. Didn't you learn anything at John Hopkins?" --Tillman
 Sitting across from Bertha reminded Sue of the time she scored those front row seats to the Gallagher show... --Sean Q
  For your information, I'm a Psychic * IVY *, you IADL pinheads! GET A LIFE! --Doc Evil
 Jim hated when he'd drift off in the middle of a coversation. When he came to, the next thing he heard Laura say was "...and it's only this big, and it barely even hurts. So, you wanna try it?" --fish in the sky
 Just hold your breath until the spots come, squint, and pretend he's George Clooney. --T.H.
 Secure in the belief that their secret identities are safe, Squirrel Girl and Slothman enjoy a casual lunch at the mall. --Florimel
 Magenta and Riff, incognito at the Olive Garden. --witchiepoo
 You know that's people, don't you? That's why I became Vegan! --Crack Baby
 Dave looked up. Had she just said, "Look, I'm a zit"? --phil
 Laurie wait for her mom to raise the milk to her lips. Timing was crucial. Wait for it...wait...now! "Mom, I'm a lesbian." --Marlboro
 Joan puffs out her cheeks in a threat display while Barry, oblivious, continues to prattle on about his new lowered Integra. --T.H.
 So what you're saying is that you don't have a job but you volunteer to "edit" captions to stupid cartoons that people send in over the Internet...Um. Can you take me home now? I have this headache. --Opie
 All you Fern fans can relax. Though our Psychic friend has gone the way of Soylent Green and "Good on you Mate", he'll be fine. In fact, right now you can see him disgussing plans for a sitcom with FOX executives... --CrAsH
 "So then she said that he said that Bill liked me, but than he said..." Unable to take any more inane babbling, Sam attempted to give himself a frontal lobotomy with a spork. --Wabewalker
 So, "Igor" huh? That's an interesting name. How did your parents decide on that? ---Colon Bowel---
 Jim was about to find out why dating Linda Blair was not as cool as he thought. --Marlboro
 Lisa tried to signal to her deaf friend that she was choking on a cheese fry, but sadly, the only letter she could remember how to make was 'e'. --Dingo Floyd
 The fern's time had come! Lunch with Sarah Michelle Gellar! Who-hoo! --Lots42

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