Richard thanked God his girlfriend had a small, low-cut, white tank top and the woman at table #3 did not. --RipperJak, shamelessly plundering the yellow asterisk for yet another caption
Although it didn't make it into the final cut, the scene where everyone in the pulp fiction diner empty their weapons into Roseanne Barr and Fran Drescher was considered by some to be a cinema masterpiece. --Mr. ?
Where nobody wants to know your name. --Mr. ?
I always wondered what the inside of Mister Rogers trolley looked like... --mutantdog
Yeah, nothing says fine dining like obnoxious decor. --lefty
The "ennui" scene from Joe Torquemada's A Streetcar Named "Not Gettin' Any." --Smokey
We've replaced Tourette's sufferer Norene's lithium with Folger's crystals. Let's see if anyone notices during choir rehearsal. --Orrin (jeez i'm sorry) Bloquy
Any weenis could play chess, only a true grandmaster could keep the pieces on the ceiling --Yakko (thought of it before reading the Sydney Chess Club -- honest)
As she watched the children frolic by the duck pond, Frieda realized just how fresh the "chicken" strips were. --Wabewalker
The last five remaining members of the Pauly Shore Appreciation Society. --Tempus Fugit, the Time Flier
Shoot, who needs LSD when you got L.A. interior decorators? --Kitsunesan
Hester winced. Despite all the waiter's assurances that her coffee contained a delicate blend of authentic Spanish coffee beans, as well as rare Malaysian herbs and spices, she still had a bad feeling about any drink called "Latte Con Carne." --Nervous Tick
"Fan to queen's light six... check." --Deiphage
A rare Yoko-One spotting. They can't be rare enough. --anon
Frontispiece from Wolfgang Puck Dies And Goes To Hell --wombat
Welcome to the 'Ross finally snaps and dumps a bottle of drain cleaner into the coffee pot' episode of Friends. --I won't be there for you.
After just a taste of the water, you'll see pretty much what everyone else is seeing... --St. Germain
There will be no Booty Call this good eve. --Treb
"This is the worst coffee Ive ever tasted" thought Thelma as she unwittingly took another sip of au jus. --lefty
Dear God, scientists have combined the genetic material of Roseanne Barr and Carrot Top! --Mr2001
Maxx and Julie huddled in the corner of the diner and hoped Mr. Gone wouldn't find them. --Lots42
Nobody paid much attention as Ben doubled over in agony. It was just a typical day at the Cafe Ptomaine. --Shem