IADL #364

 18 yr old internet blond co-ed. --Waldo
 To Kirk's horror, Scotty begins to activate the transporter beam just as Kirk finishes downloading naked pics of that Green Orion chick. --agm
 July 2, 2052: William Keane IV labors over the latest Family Circus panel: 'Who dumped the pasketti and meat bulbs into the hypothermal tachyon fusion core?' 'Not Me!' --agm
 It's probably for the best that we can't see the monitor. The world's not ready for amputee-leper-fat porn. --Field Marshall Stack Isn't Supposed to Be in the Fuckin' Green Zone! Jesus!
 "Hey, I ordered us a pizza online! How do I download it?" --Big ol' Bob
 The great enigma: Am I captioning the picture, or is the picture captioning me? --Riff
 "You know, it's a hard job, coming up with all this internet porn. But, knowing that there are nine year olds out there waiting to read about Wilma Flintstone getting it on with Jane Jetson and Daphne from Scooby Doo keeps me working as hard as ever!" --Matt Rossi
 "Cool! Another witty .sig to print out and stick to my wall! comp.lang.perl.misc is the coolest!" --hippie
 "Repetitive stress disorder, here I come!" --Lots42@aol.com
 "With America Online, I feel like a part of a vibrant worldwide community instead of just come dork in a cubicle." --SlappyJack
 Jerry tries the "Naked Lara Croft" cheat for the first time. In no time at all, he realized the cheat also worked on _John Madden Football_, thus allowing his therapist to purchase that new Mercedes Benz. --kyosuke
 The plans were set, the schedules all in place, just three more keystrokes and he would corner the world market in Apple IIc software! --The Sandman
 Murray, long warned not to use a Ouija mouse pad, spends the next six hours channeling Liberace. --Orrin Bloquy
 Don't laugh, he's downloading pictures of all your ex-girlfriends in poses you couldn't hope to see in three-space. --Orrin Bloquy
 Moments later, Ty was explaining to his boss exactly *how* playtesting Virtual Valerie fit within the parameters of a technical writer's job description. --Orrin Bloquy
 Meanwhile, back in the Oval Office, Al Gore sneaks into Bill Clinton's study to hack into his email system and send a fake message to Ken Starr ......" Dear Starr, GO FUCK YOURSELF, ASSHOLE!!!!, love, CigarMan69"..... --Timmy's Flat Rotting Colon
 Ted's plan to induce carpal tunnel syndrome in order to get six months off was abandoned when he realized wrist surgery would seriously impact his self-gratification activities. --lefty
 Chuck, the only man who doesn't understand why people think Dilbert is funny. --Mighty Phallus
 Let's just see what's new on www.overbite.com for today... --Kingohugs
 Computers have really altered the very structure of our society....for example....chess club memberships are way down... -- mutantdog
 The new IMAC comes equipped with a "Porn" button, standard. --Doc Evil
 Oooooooooh! Breasts! --Doc Evil
 Web-surfing uberhacker, or 3-day-old rigor mortis? Let's hear from our panel of judges.... --Stealth
 Paul enters a caption for a photo featuring Paul, entering a caption for a photo featuring Paul, entering a caption for a photo featuring Paul, entering a caption for a photo featuring Paul, entering a caption... --kyosuke
 "Dammit! My hive's under attack from the Protoss again!" --RipperJak
 ...and yet more living proof as to why it's called a "dork box" --SlappyJack
 Attention DFC'ers this is what you look like to fellow coworkers. --anon
 Here we see the average American Proletariat hard at work for a major company. Look, but don't mock him. --anon
 "Paperless office my ass!" --RipperJak
 Our support people are available 24 hours a day, because we have them eached hooked into a catheder. --anon
 Let's see... it's either Steve Jobs in 1982 or Steve Jobs today... --Thomas Wilde
 alt.binaries.pictures.erotica.cartoons.overbite had found its spokesmodel. --Thomas Wilde
 This game sucks. I'm trapped in a room with no exits again. --Mr. ?
 Summon Computer Geek. Casting Cost: 1 Blue, 1 Red, 1 Colorless Mana. 1/1. Tap to remove all your opponents' weenie counters from play while they discuss hacking strategies. Quote: "Ph33r my 'l33t ski11s" --Yeoman Snackwhore of the Caption Salvage Crew
 This is what EVERY asshole looks like that starts chain letters. kill this man on sight --Marco
 Here we see the male homo sapien subspecies dorkus maximus (drone). Note the drab appearance- designed not to attract the attention of the female, allowing him to channel all of his energy into his work. --lefty -caption salvage volunteer