IADL #389
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 Goliath Gorilla and Camel Girl corner their archnemesis Dr. Bland in the next exciting issue of "Dork Factor." --DieLifeDie
 "Sir Mix-A-Lot is running a little bit behind today, so to speak, but if you'll just have a seat... " --Farfisa
 Listen, Denise, you're pretty, but you're no Fay Wray. He probably just wants directions to the observation deck. --Ratman
 Jason had come to an important moment in his life....should he continue on his way to see the Directors cut of King Kong for the 31st time or actually try talking to a girl. --Waldo
 Dork: It's whats for dinner --aK h(ell)
 "Okay, it's $200 extra for using bananas and swinging around the room, but I ain't pickin' no fleas out of your back hair, honey." --Cranky Bear
 I really don't know if this monster gorilla face is scaring me more than your monster ass. --Giggles
 As long as your father is at the window, I'm not coming a step closer. --Yakko
 We have a slight underbite with #18 misaligned. Your son needs braces pronto, and I'd also recommend electrolysis. --Ken
 Even without a signature, the size of that butt makes it clear that Bil Keane was here. --Yakko
 Do you, by any chance, have an extra case of Mentos? --Namgubed the Merry Elf
 King Kong vs. Melissa's Ass. The giant ape, having taken on Godzilla and a slew of other monsters, tries to defeat a mall chick's enormous ass. Nobody wins. One and a half stars. --Pete
 "What do you mean by 'family resemblance,' you little shit?!" Julia's new boyfriend really screws up on the next "Party of Five." --crispy
 Actually Ralph, I would rather be consumed by the giant gorilla than go out with you. --The 13th Angel
 Summoned by the combined forces of Trekkies everywhere, King Kong arrives to devour Wil Wheaton. --snackwhore (salvaging Pete)
 Of course he's pissed. The third remake of "Kong" and instead of Jessica Lange he gets Janeane Garofalo and James van der Beek. --anon
 Super Mario does a 180 after one look at the princess held captive by Donkey Kong. --Valvoline
 " Tell her the truth! Tell her you're two-timing her! ". As the banana tinted wave of breath washed over him, Jasper reflected upon how his conscience was getting way too intrusive. And ugly. --the Engine
 Tricia's distended anus mislead Kong into thinking she was in heat. Two months later, the folks on the 14th floor were still finding monkey semen in their hair --Brandolon Hill
 Secrets of Successful Prostitutes #1: When settling a price, have your pimp on hand to make sure the deal goes smoothly and safely. --Doctor X
 The next cartoon to be made into a live-action film: 'Magilla Gorilla - The Rage of One Angry Ape.' It's sort of a 'Addams Family Values' meets 'gunshot wound to the temple' film. --Noonch (attempting a Red Zone salvage)
 Tucker stood stock still, transfixed by the glorious image of a "Big-Assed Reba" right in front of him. Rarely did one so young venture from the litter to a place of culture.... --AndyK
 Jen, I have to be truthful. The giant gorilla has a smaller ass then you. --Feren
 Actually, Marie, my pal Kong here says you WILL put out tonight... --Leth
 So, your ass or mine? PLACE! I MEANT PLACE! --Rev. Evil Ed
 "No, this is the Simian Beastiality convention. The Friends of the Planet of the Apes convention is next door. Dork." --Cranky Bear
 Yes, even Mighty Joe Young hates Wil Wheaton. --Pete

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