IADL #402
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 If you would just hold still... I could use your entire fingernail to deactivate the bomb in the watchband case. MacGyver -- the shaggy years --Al-Muhammad Qataf Ahafgh Smith
 ...adn yet another case of the dreaded and quite mysterious "Jewelry Store Heist Narcolepsy." next frame, please... --Al-Muhammad Qataf Ahafgh Smith
 "Son, if one more counterperson asks, 'You a member of ZZ Top?', shoot me." --Crack Baby
 The Mall Rabbi and his apprentice face off against a gelatinous cube in the weirdest-ass game of D&D I ever played ... --Riff
 "It says here the price of those earrings is $2500 or my eternal soul ... I'm thinking! Don't rush me, here!" --Riff
 Actually, that's Father O'Donnell and his 'little friend' on Halloween. --Riff
 I'd worry about going to hell for submitting captions to this one, but we Jews don't believe in hell, so what the fuck. --Riff (Hava Negila)
 "Yeah, dad. But I'm looking for a cock-ring that'll really compliment my circumsicion." --BAR-1
 Sholom and Duddy, the Millennium Bug specialists of Crown Heights, work feverishly on solving the upcoming crisis. It being 5759, however, they had 241 years left to reset all the abacuses. --Orrin "shpilkes" Bloquy
 After several thousand Jewish Americans were found wandering into stores and staring at shiny surfaces, the product line for the LSD-coated dreidels was yanked off the market. --anon
 "Hand to Yaweh, if so much as one more person says "2-Live Jews", it's gonna be wall-to-wall dead Gentiles!" --BAR-1
 After years of study and practice, Daniel masters the ancient ritual and faithfully bangs out "Inna-Gadda-Da-Vida" on the CasioTone. "Today, my son, you are a man," his father tearfully intones. --Orrin Bloquy
 Heartbroken at his son's choice of webcoding for WindowsCE over the rabbinate, Morris chokes out "I-heff-no-son." --Scene from "The Java Singer." --Orrin Bloquy
 Having carefully studied the homies at their 3 Card Monte, Rabbi "Fingers" Molotov tricks Yitzhak into a frenzy of deck play. --Orrin "enough, already" Bloquy
 "Talk to the Yammakah." --Crack Baby
 "Sometimes my pais get in the way of my soldering, so I wind them around my ear." --snackwhore
 "...and that, mah boy - I say, that, mah boy, is a gen-yoo-ine diamond. Now, you can take over the business while's ah go a'fishin!" -Foghorn Rosenburg --snackwhore
 "Well, this gold 4-finger 'Yaweh' ring is only $20 more than the 3-finger version." "Honey, 4 fingers would be tacky." --jfis
 Yankele marvels at Asian miniaturization, not realizing (tragically) the Sony MohelMaster 2000 is built to Japanese specs. --Orrin "Just Ask Xaviera Hollander" Bloquy
 "I liked Yentl as much as the next Jew, but why would Eli want a Barbra Streisand watch?" --Ashhole
 "Okay, actin' like a jewish schoolboy is free. But if you want me to DRESS like one, it's gonna cost you extra." --Magus
 After attending a costume party as "Abe Lincoln the Mobster" and "Prep School Pirate", Jim and Mike wondered why they'd gotten such funny looks in Moshe's Watch shop. --A Grouch
 "No, you may NOT get the Aladdin and Jasmine couple. I didn't work hard so you could gawk at some svelte Arab couple and their posessed carpet whenever you need the time!" --A Grouch
 "Okay, son, watch and learn....get it....watch...oh man, I am such a pistol....Where's your sense of humor, son? This is funny stuff." -- mutantdog, taking the stupid approach
 "...and when we have collected enough clear plastic watches, we shall be in a position to monopolize Israel's economy!" --RipperJak
 "Yes, the G-shock is very nice too. But is that date on the Jewish calendar, young Isaac?" --Ashhole
 Bracelets? DJ Rabbi K don't go for no jive-ass bracelets! --Smokey

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