IADL #411
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 Gallant practices using his floatation device. Goofus puts on a wig and sucker punches himself. --mooey
 (chhcrkk) Okay, go ahead and flood the chamber...I'm the only one wearing a preserver... (chrrchhch) --Cranky Bear
 Edna demonstrates for the others how she just hit the pervert in the hat. --Kirok
 The Borg geek materialized on the bridge just as Capt. Janeway farted. --Kirok
 Well, it look likes Paramount has hit rock bottom with the latest Star Trek spinoff, "Star Trek: The Love Starship". Look for guest stars Lyle Waggoner and Rose Marie annoying the Captain (Don Knotts) in the debut episode... --Tillman
 In this gameshow, if you don't answer correctly, you get beaten by a stormtrooper with a nerf club. --Mr. ?
 Wow, you know, my husband never plays 'armpit fart and duck call' love songs for me... You are such a lucky woman! --Luna
 When a Cruise-on-a-Budget ship goes down, the human beatbox performs "Nearer my God to Thee." --Semillama
 Belchior, the Vomiting Illusionist, was a short-lived success at children's parties during the early 80's. --King Catherine the Transvestite
 In this scene from Star Trek XCVI: Myocardial Infarction, Admiral Data leads the crew through a water landing drill in 10 Forward. 1 1/2 stars. --crispy
 "Star Trek: Branson, Missouri" wasn't nearly as successful as the other Star Trek spinoffs. --Rev. Jason N Whitmore
 The most anticipated trailer of 1999: James Cameron's Lusitania --Ken
 Al skipped out on the camoufloge lesson in Ninja class, and had paid dearly for it. --Valvoline
 This hack comic was killing the telethon, and those life perservers weren't helping. --Valvoline
 Steve hated getting the seniors' tours. They always got nervous on the "Magic Under the Sea" segment and all that cat food made their flatulence downright deadly. --Talisker
 Ensign Harry Kim plays out his holodeck fantasy of auto-erotic-asphyxiation while surrounded by middle-aged Swedes. --A Grouch
 Reno was full of third rate Leonardo diCaprio impersonators and drunken Norwegians. I stayed in my hotel room and smoked a lot. --A Grouch
 Mrs. Palowski smiles pretty on set at the KMart™ Desconstructivist Fantasy Photo Studio™ --ChoppingBlock
 On the new Jeopardy. Wierd costumes, self-inflicted wounds, and a "Whirling Death Fan" slowly descending fromt he ceiling. ... I... must... kill... Ted Turner!! --BAR-1
 The Stinky Lotus Monkey: One of many rejected Karma Sutra submissions --Leth
 This HAS to be the WORST singles club on Earth. --Hooper_X
 Gwen finds tantric sex isn't all it's cracked up to be. --Brad Popsiclestick
 John demonstrates how to defend yourself from a shark with halitosis. --Crack Baby
 As the ship sinks, Frank realizes all the lifejackets are made from 100% real Wisconsin cheddar. The suicidal Milwaukee women around him smirk in triumph. --A Grouch
 Lucky prize-winners will also receive a green baseball cap, a jumbo Oscar Mayer weiner whistle, and -- hey! Are you listening to me? --Bad Girl
 All this money for an undersea voyage -- and the entertainment is a prop comic? --Bad Girl
 The strip-o-gram agency misunderstands Sheila's request for a guy with a big "salami." --Bad Girl
 When the THX sound system went out, Phil tried desperately to improvise. "Luke, I am your father...." --Bad Girl
 "Nope. No one here is watching Touched by an Angel, either." Neilsen Ratings Trouble-Shooters --Bad Girl

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