IADL #422
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 Bob wonders why a machine would give five quarters for a dollar. Bob shrugs, and puts a dollar in the machine. The machine whirrs and clicks, and suddenly there is a brief, brilliant flash of light. Bob is stunned. Bob slowly recovers, looks at the machine carefully....and wonders, why would a machine give five quarters for a dollar... -- mutantdog
 "Honey? You won't believe what I'm calling you on!" --crispy
 "This little baby will take care of all your inner-city problems... it dispenses heroin, crack, knives, assorted shivs, loaded revolvers and other gang miscellany. Once we get that CIA funding on board, we'll have these in every subway station in America! Next slide..." --crispy
 Earl always got a kick out of saying "Open the cash bay door, HAL" --Bleech_
 Rapper Special K ponders how he's going to get his new boom box onto the subway. --Nate
 In the future, computers will have hard drives that will be able to store up to ten whole megabytes of information, and will be availble to the public in large cities. The Future Is Neato, 1965, Thurson Publishing --Werehamster
 Hey, they upgraded the condom machine!!! --Theodoric of York
 2-Low, as his friends called him, wasn't the brighest gangsta in the world. He met his demise when he held up a vending machine, and it fell on him. --Hooper_X
 Just to spite the State Attorneys General, Glock installed vending machines in the Nation's subways. --kyosuke
 Young white supremacists start out with only one K. --Les Miserables
 In order to curb the rampant population growth, white trash disposal sites were set up all over the South. --Brandolon Hill
 You know its going to be a 'Bad Day' when the subway machine doesn't give you any tolkens but does initiate Defcon 4. --Mr. ?
 It's important -- very very very very important -- to read all of the instructions before using the condom machines at Mos Eisley Spaceport. --Rotter
 Now that the Crips are computer-networked, the Bloods can't wait 'till Y2K. --Riff
 Damon Wayans is electrocuted by a faulty karaoke machine and is reincarnated as a sassy, jive-talking New York subway Autopay machine! Coming this May on The WB! --Rotter
 This subway fare machine is so complicated, the average New Yorker spends a full forty seconds reading its directions before they pee all over it. --Rotter
 After Russia's collapse, it's getting easier and easier to buy weapon grade plutonium on the street. --Mr. ?
 Being just a tourist, Jerome didn't understand why the ticket machines at the Stepford stop had datalink ports. --Agent Elite
 Jake Sisko "Gets jiggy wit' it" on the Promenade... --Doc Evil
 From the film "Ghetto Warz." Here, we see Dontay Streetwalker, and his robot friend, UB-12, as they face off against the White Cracker Empire's fierce Vending Machine. --Hooper_X
 "Okay...Spanish... Swahili... Japanese... French... where the fuck is the ENGLISH on this thing?" --Hooper_X
 Just another example of Whitey's capitalist regime holding a brother down. That machine ain't got no fuckin' SNICKERS in it! --Hooper_X
 "Shit, Adric, The Doctor's regenerating again!" --Heath
 Irony 101: This boys favorite band is Rage Against the Machine --Valvoline
 "Malfunction. Reinsert dollar. Please repeat. Again. Again. Faster. Faster! Oh, yeah-- that's the way, baby..." --Valvoline
 The new Porta-Blow, for the pervert on the go! --Les Miserables
 Yet another fine graduate of the University of Kentucky, trying to figure out how to work that new fangled technology. --badlawyer
 Accept cookie from IRT Ticketvendor? Y/N --Heath
 ...and within moments, your second mortgage is processed and your FirstBorn VISA comes out, activated and minty-fresh! --excerpt from The Idiot's Guide to Total Debt Slavery, Chapter 8: The Nineties, or How I Learned To Stop Worrying And Love the Y2K Bug --Orrin Bloquy
 R2, R2, Where the FUCK are ya? --Dun Dun
 NEW! ScudCo. brand Dispoable assassins! Pop a dollar in, pop a cap in an ass! ScudCo assassins are available in all finer slums and projects. New, from ScudCo! --Hooper_X
 Sure, it was a bitch lugging around a 150 lb. tube of Chapstick, but a Costco bargain is a Costco bargain. --Wabewalker
 LEROY 2000, HAL's ghetto cousin, was every bit as tyrannical as his whitebread relative. "Open the fuckin' subway doors, LEROY!" "Kiss my black ASS, BITCH!" --Hooper_X
 Despite a huge ad campaign, giant public toasters never caught on.... --Bad Girl
 "Infernal machine!" screamed Kastalek, lord of hell. "Give me my well-deserved subway transer ticket or suffer my wrath!" --RipperJak
 Michael Nesmith and his pet Univac, in a rare private moment. --Grumba Zip
 In an even further attempt to minimalise medical costs, HMOs began to experiment with subway "CompuDoc"s --happy me

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