When it's 3 AM and you're trying to caption Bob Costas' audioanimatronic head, it's time to go to sleep. --Riff
Remember to tip your waitstaff at The Restaurant of the Damned. REMEMBER..... --Jenn Dolari
Museum exhibits come and go, but the kids will always remember French Revolution Alive! --flodnak
"Fuck! I hate it when Al Gore just pops out of the bushes like that! I think I spilled my milkshake." --Talisker
"Welcome to RoboBurger! The machines will harvest your bodies and rule your pitiful surface world! Would you like fries with that?" --Talisker
Good marketing idea: Elby's Big Boy. Bad marketing idea: Hardee's Giant Disembodied Head. --anon
The elder gods had their revenge on Regis Philbin by reincarnating him into an automated head in a poorly attended restaurant kiosk in Knotts Berry Farms. --RipperJak
Only two things ever frightened me: clowns, and whatever the hell that thing was that Mr. Rafferty kept on his front lawn. --The Enigma
The "Talk with a Vice President" attraction could never compete with the nearby "Masturbating Boy in a Glass Room." --crispy
"Spinnwebe: we WILL crush your will to live." --The Enigma
Origin of the naval term going to the head --Ken
Unknown to many out-of-towners, some of the swankier Hollywood restaurants started implementing extreme measurers to deal with has-beens who still insisted on getting the royal treatment. I found that out the day I saw the bloody disembodied head of Chevy Chase staring blankly at me from a fence spike outside The Pimento Grove. --Nervous Tick(Okay, I know it's not a real restaurant..sue me)
"Do you hate your kids? Then bring 'em on down to the drive-through at Uberburger!" --The Enigma
The talking head at Spewburger restaurants was shortly removed after complaints about the random "spew" function. --Crack Baby
I dunno Jim. This year's vegetable garden just seems....CREEPY somehow. --Bleech_
Allan Quatermain stared contempuously past the blank, staring eyes of Professor Chillingsworth. Headhunters be damned! He wanted a Frosty! --Pete
"Hi there! I died in a state of sin and have been condemned to an eternity of this! Can I take your order?" --Pete
I will now attempt to caption while drinking a glass of water. --Brandolon Hill
Every Christmas and Good Friday, thousands made the pilgrimage to Billy Bob's Steakhouse to watch Cajun Sauce run like tears from the Talkin' Bob's face. --Leaf
'Please deposit one french fry into my mouth. Do not worry; I will not bite you.' --agm
Now that is effective camoflage. --Samwise
Suddenly, Bill, Ted, Loqueisha, and Edna the Huge Tub of Crap began to sense an evil presence watching them... they shuddered as they realized their old arch-nemesis Howdy of Doody was back from the grave, with Marv Albert's toupee! --Phat Cheops
Al Gore is currently suing. --Samwise
Guess he's the head gardner. --Samwise
Disturbing thought #86: Whoever thought this monstrosity up gets paid. More than you do, probably. --Samwise
Why yes... I think... Windows... is a... fine... product... --ewhac
"This is what we will do to your head if you disobey the Burger World empire. Obey the Burger World empire." --crisis.
The Chotan tribe of urban ventrilloquist headhunters was just one of the many dangers travelers face in Brazil. --ChAoS
Featureless microphone / food's just as good as home: Creepy head on a stick / takeout will make you sick. My youthful summers in the food service community had left me well versed in the arcane lore of convenience food, a knowledge for which I was frequently grateful. --Annna
People waited patiently in line for tickets to the "throw a brick at Bob Saget's head" attraction. --Rotgut
You know what I hate about this restaurant? Ever time I drink a glass of water, the damn dummy starts singing. --Bad Girl
Talking Larry got even eerier when his scalp was electrified to keep birds off his head. --Bad Girl
HTML reminder: Never leave out the body tag. --Bad Girl
"Dare ya to come back here at midnight. Dare ya....." --Bad Girl
...and the genie said, "Are you sure you want to wish for immortality?", and I said, "Of course, you dumbass! What a stupid question!" What was I thinking? --Kurt L.
Hello folks and welcome to McHell --Mr. ?
August 22, 2008. Skyburger becomes self aware. Nobody notices. --Mr. ?
You must be at least this deranged to ride the IADL. --Mr. ?
So Al Gore was actually an evil immortal. Who'da thunk it? --Gladstone
What's really creepy is how it dispenses change. --Mr. ?
Haunt Your Toddler's Dreamlife For Decades Land wasn't so popular with the kids; but mothers liked it. --Horselover Fat
The worst thing about Havelock's Horror House is... this is not the only Dan Quayle body part that pops up. --Horselover Fat
Yes, Madamme, we serve Lambchop. And Fraggle. ------->142857
"Woo woo! Look at the knockers on that babe!" Barry said through the microphone. Luckily for him, the decayed speakers on the order machine were only able to make out "WHZZHUXZZ YUZZUZZ ASXZZZXCKZZ YUAZZZBZZZB." --RipperJak (Salvaging Bad Girl)
HHHsssssss!!!!! I can hear the whiny drone of Gilbert Godfreid already ------->142857
So let it be written: He who pulls the head from off this pike shall be ruler and king of a small but dirty province near Macedonia. --Phat Cheops
Disneyland's newest animatronic attraction, The Hall of Shatners, was abysmal down to the snack bar. --Orrin Bloquy
Grand Moff Tork's head placed outside Coruscant's largest Burger King was an object lesson for all. Never make Lord Vader wait for his tater tots. --The Notorious D.F.C. (use the forks, Luke)
Animatronic Jehovah's Witnesses can be ignored at a much more efficient rate than their human counterparts. --for(;;);
Isn't this the part where I start falling into blackness and wake up covered in sweat shrieking "No fries! No fries!" ? --A Grouch
Welcome to Burger Brothel. Would you like to try a nooner from our new value menu? --aK h
People could handle the demonic cackles. They even got used to the head spinning on its stick and spitting foam. What really freaked them out, though, was when it started singing the "Shamu song" --"Bob"
No this is not the world's largest Pez dispenser. It is however, the world's most embarrasing-to-use Maxipad dispenser --A Grouch
Sadly, Koppelburger went under within two months after customer complaints that the robotic greeter meandered off-topic to report irrelevant value-meals. --Florimel