IADL #480
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 National Champion, Mystery Date '99 --Ken
 Master Zondor will see you now...please leave your donation in the bowl by the door. --Waldo
 My name's Larry, and this is the guy who lives in my closet! --Crack Baby
 The bad news: These are your new roommates. The worse news: Your name is Jill. --rudy
 A rare photo of "LindaG" and "Nanette", sysadmins of wymyn4wymyn.net --djerkwhad
 Every so often, Jerry would let his father out of the basement and show him to his friends. --Mr. Me
 And to show you how durable our computer cases are, we're going to have "Tiny" here jump up and down on this one. --Mr. Me
 I'm almost afraid to ask about bachelor #3. --Mr. Me
 Hey ladies! We is here to get our freak on! --Tertius Quid
 Maybe it was the tequilla, maybe it was fate...all Randall knew was that he was leaving the party with that tall brunette who had been making eyes at him all evening. --Tertius Quid
 Koyaanisqatsi (n.) [ --Daniel M. Laenker (co-authoring with mdxi)
 "Dude, come check out this fuckin' LOG I just dropped!" --djerkwhad
 Sure, laugh at them now, but in 5 years...oh, who are we kidding? Laugh at them _now_. --The Interrupting Cow
 Oh, Jay...Silent Bob...say it ain't _so_! --The Interrupting Cow
 Tekken 3, Dates 0. --The Interrupting Cow
 "Hey--three's a crowd." --Valvoline
 Ladies and Gentlemen, your University of Texas Sailor Moon fan club. --Jenn "Self Duplicating" Dolari
 "Mom, Dad, I'd like you to meet Dwayne. I'm his new bitch!" Suddenly Rev Falwell awoke in a cold sweat. This last nightmare had been the worst yet... --Leth
 You just knew MTV's Fanatic was in trouble when they aired Andy and his hero "Eddie, the Network administrator." --Frost
 "Us? Nah, Mom, we weren't doin' anything." Randy was so stunned his Mom was home early that, even as he protested, his hand kept stroking Bruce's bare thigh. --narcoleptic (self-salvaging)
 "The 3-D Accelerator Arrives" -- Color Photograph, LadyJ, 1999 --crispy
 Hey, great! You're just in time for our big Monty Python sing-along! We're Knights of the Round Table.... --Gaijin Marty
 Now, before you start asking questions about all the fur and blood all over your vacuum cleaner, let me stall you with some meaningless compliments while Earl finishes sweeping up all the bones. --agm
 Eric, remember all those wedgies you gave me Initiation Week while writing "PUSSY" on my forehead? Billy-Bob here says he's got something even funnier for you out in the hall. --Orrin Bloquy
 Sensing trouble nearby, Skynyrd-Man and his ward Hamster-Boy spring into action. --Orrin Bloquy
 Poncatello, IA State U Creative Anachronism Society, l-r: Jason "Verily, Friar Tuck" Sczepanski, roommate Sean "Mighty Thewed Nameless Warrior Of Ni!" Humphreys. --Stan Xhiao
 Bill knew when he enrolled that state budget cuts had meant some decline in quality of campus services, but he was going to complain about the substandard Lazlo living in his closet anyway. --HasNoName, salvaging semillama
 "Aah! That guy on the left was in my high school art class! He'd answer to "Pestilence" and could tell your fortune by pulling Scrabble tiles pulled out of an old black sock. I see he's married now..." --A Grouch
 Somebody order a meat loaf? --Norm DePlume
 Virgins on parade! --Mr. ?
 Just as you can rely on the morning sun, you can count on college kids emerging at the scent of pizza. --Jackie
 You don't know their names, you've never seen them, and chances are there are no records of their existence. But if they were to quit their jobs, Microsoft would crumble in just a few days. --Magus
 "You will be assimilated into our hive. Oh, you think you can escape but it is futile. You will join our D&D collective. --Mr. Macleod
 This gentle facade hides the hours upon hours spent fighting over the rank of Dungeon Master. --for(;;);
 And if Scott peeks out of his dorm room and sees his shadow, that means there's going to be six more weeks of Anime Porn. --Mr. ?
 The younger one, somewhat more naive, stared in open curiosity. A silverback male cast its cautious gaze from its hiding place. They were truely beautiful, these geeks in the mist. --Magus (with groveling apologies to many, many people)
 Today, you call them "The Geeky Gamer Guys in 213." Come December, you'll call them when you need amphetamines. --rudy
 Losers, the Gathering [tm]. --narcoleptic
 These guys are almost enough to turn me into a lesbian, even though it'd mean I'd have to have a sex-change! --narcoleptic
 Go ahead. Giggle allllll you want, ladies. But let's see how pathetic and repulsive you think they are a year from today when an IPO has given them a combined net-worth of $80,000,000, hmmmm? --Rotter
 Gerburiel, the elven guide, stands proudly displaying his pointed ears and sissy haircut. Thurgin the Dwarf, in contrast, is ashamed of his shortness and stands on several gaming manuals to hide his lack of height. --A Grouch
 The web-surfer franctically clicks at the "next picture" button. With an Internet Use skill of 7 and a roll of 9, he hits a Critical Fumble, pitching headlong into a gay porn site. --Magus
 Hi, we're from down the hall. Can we borrow a cup of dice? --Annna
 Geekdar off the scale Captain! --Mr. ?
 OK, UPS guy . . . one guess where that crate of Rohypnol goes . . . --Hang Lose
 "Hello, I'm coming door to door through your campus in order to spread the . . . uh . . . Good Word . . .um . . about . . uh . . aw, shit wouldya look at the time?" --Hang Lose
 Nick's parents are astonished to see their son come out of the closet.....with a Heck's Angel, nonetheless. --The Enigma (nod to anon)
 Much to their confusion, no females wanted to create a sorority to complement Keith and Lucas's new fraternity. --The Enigma
 Obi-Wan beavis and Qui-Gon Butthead. They sit on their couch and mock Farscape and Babylon 5 reruns. Only on the Sci-Fi Channel. --Riff
 At first, I thought the ABC/Playboy merger would be a good thing, but when some late-night ESPN2 show featured a pud-tossing contest, I unsubscribed from cable. --crispy
 "Welcome to Bob and Jeremy's Red Dragon Inn. Please, take off your shoes, get comfortable, and roll for initiative." --K-Man (Self-salvaging. From drowning, of course.)
 "Enter and behold my most awesome bong." --I am Kirok!!!
 Scene from Goofus and Gallant: The Movie --K-Man
 The trick here, Lady J thought to herself, is to show them my new piercing and get their reaction shot at the same time. --Riff
 Fourteen bottles of cut-rate soda: $9.46. Six bags of chips and a pack of Hostess Snoballs: $8.17. Rulebooks, dice, and sharpened #2 pencils: $56.89. Making a saving throw against Dragon Breath, rolling 20 on strike, and dealing double damage: priceless. --snackwhore
 "Stoned? No Ma. We were just listening to the Carpenters Album you bought me for Christmas. I always get this glazed look when I listen to the Carpenters. --Lame-O

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