IADL #543
(some picture)  (<<)  (<)  (>)  (>>)
  (?)    '?'

 "See Bob, this is what happens when you buy a 'three story modern condo fixer-upper' on Ebay." --Torc.
 Little did Bob and Janet know that Ronald McDonald was on the roof of the restaurant, prepared to enforce PlayLand's 12-years-or-younger policy with a high-powered rifle. --Wabewalker
 "Dude, I know you hired the best architect in San Francisco, I know it cost you a bundle... but shouldn't there be some, like, walls?" --Nyder
 "Man, it seems like we've been on these steps forever!" Some visitors to EscherWorld just don't get it. --crispy
 With materials shortages becoming more and more acute, Soylent, Inc. is forced to resort to live trapping. --Nyder
 It wasn't just that hyperintelligent gerbils had conquered Earth, it was that all forms of transportation had been replaced by crawl-through tubes. --Trainman
 The only trouble with pet giant space hamsters is cleaning up pellets the size of minivans. --ChAoS
 The federal government pursues all illegal homemade distilleries, but some are bigger priorities than others. --Eric the .5b
 Barb and Mike's bondage apparatus keeps getting more and more complex. --The Mad Puffin
 The keys to a good dork habitat are fresh air, plenty of water, and a place for your dorks to climb. --The Mad Puffin
 Sure, it developed their muscles, intellectual skills and artistic abilities. But thanks to their father's decision to design their jungle gym, Terry Gilliam's children would be in therapy for years. --Nyder
 Like similar species such as the sundew, the pitcher plant and the Venus flytrap, the Californian slacker-plant camouflages itself in order to lure its prey into its maw. --Nyder
 The Citadel of the League of Gay Superheroes was carefully hidden, brilliantly defended and, of course, fantastically tasteful. --Nyder
 "And up here we se the beginning of the large intestines..." "Ah, Jenny? I'm impressed and all but this is a little big for the science fair." --Kal
 Peter Parker tried to copy Superman's Fortress of Solitude, but yuppies kept bringing their damn brats by and letting them climb all over it. --Weasel
 ...and we're climbing the Stairway to Hedonism! --Joe Z
 "I watch them run away from me...I used to do the same thing...years I was a slave..turning in my wheel..each lap one lap closer to my death! Is that all you wanted me for?! Your amusement?! But now...you see don't you? You see who's the entertainment...and my good 'masters,' it is definitely not Fuffie-Noogin the Hamster." --Princess Crucifix
 Due to a misprint on the court documents, Irene and Bert found themselves working off their community service hours at Habitrail for Humanity. --Samurai Cat in Training
 Ah, those dot-com worksites were tons of fun... --Down10
 "Please insert twenty-five cents to see another Rush album cover..." --Orrin Bloquy
 The Stairway to Heaven and Highway to Hell are popular, but no one ever mentions the Habitrail to Hoboken. --Helder
 In one of Galileo's lesser-known experiments, he dropped an air-head and a muscle-head down a waterslide to see which one drowned first. --Helder
 The one good thing about surviving World War III is that there were no more damn lines at Disneyworld. --The Hanged Man
 Rube Goldberg's pencil-sharpener. --tgapds
 "Oy! See, inside this oidd structure, we shall see a few shuggoths and pierhaps a rieal live Elder God. It'll probably be sleeping and dreaming bout the doom of mankoind, so my wife and oi are gonna have to kick it in the head a few times." - Scene from the pilot and last episode of the new nature show 'Cthulhu Hunter' --Mr. ?
 "We're still years away from opening the world's largest Mexican restaurant, but at least all the plumbing is in place." --Helder
 By the 5th series of "Survivor", CBS knew it was reaching. But the public didn't seem to care. --Anastasia
 Dislodging the fat kids was the worst job at Happyland --Treb
 "I'm impressed, Earl. Just how many Happy Meals did it take to collect the whole set?" --Skizzy the Wonder Lizard
 Jenny and Michael longed in vain to find other people willing to join them in their Snakes-and-Ladders paradise. --Darren
 Any manager of Discovery Zone will sweat bullets right before the Plastic Ball Inspectors arrive. --Down10

Back to the IADL Archive index
Back to It's A Dysfunctional Life