IADL #548
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 "Wait a minute -- this isn't a microscope. It's a periscope into the girls' locker room. Mr. Wizard, you're the greatest!" --Helder
 Those aren't amoebas! That's my mom and Mr Rogers in a hot tub! GROSS! --Not Like Everybody Else
 Nobel Prize and Time Man of the Year Award in hand, Professor Gaines went back for the one glory that had eluded him. Mrs. Jenkins' 3rd grade science fair. --mf
 It took a lot of persuading, but eventually he managed to lure young Anakin over to the Dork Side. --Nyder
 In the years after his fall from grace, Maculley Culken was resorted to selling his precocious screams to science. --Down10
 "Gee Mr Wizard, I don't see anything." "Thats right Billy, you wished there were no more germs, and there are no rotifers left to see. And your termite collection will die without bacteria to digest cellulose. Oh yeah, and you're going to bleed to death through your gums without bacteria to make vitamin K." "Nooooooooooo! Come back germs, come back! I'm sorry I wished you away!" --slibs
 "Alright, the shit looks pure. Gimme two hundred dime bags and a couple of party packs." --Helder
 Do you believe in love at first sight? --dALY
 Bitter and disillusioned, Harry Potter wound up a regular on the convention circuit, selling his most rabid fans samples of his DNA. --Coalcracker
 Great Moments in Grade School Science: Richie Tagworth isolates the girl germ. --Lloyd Dobler
 Publicity still from the failed sequel, Willy Wonka and the Ebola Factory. --Torc.
 "Jesus-Christ-Suspended-In-Agar-Agar, that's one big fucking amoeba!" --Stan Xhiao
 "What the--are those angels doing the Macarena? That's it, i'm converting." --Skizzy the Hell-bound Wonder Lizard
 "Nope, you're not my daddy either. Next!" --Stan Xhiao
 It was bad enough when Timmy saw dead people. It got worse when they started giving him science lessons. --Nyder
 "Gee Mr Wonka, maybe you shouldn't have shown that Mike Teevee kid your new compact camera." --Helder
 "Hello, Coach Donaldson. Remember when you said I was too short to play for the basketball team?" --Helder
 The day Keith Richards filled in for Mr. Wizard will always be remembered as a dark day in children's programming. --UFO_Charlie
 Hi, sir, I'm the new Timmy you asked for. --Joe Z
 Simon was *this close* to getting the Nobel Prize until the unfortunate invention of the Hydraulic Eyeball Extractor demonstrated here. --Orrin Bloquy

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