IADL #550
(some picture)  (<<)  (<)  (>)  (>>)
  (?)    '?'

 "It's alright, sweetie ... the NASDAQ will probably bounce back up tomorrow." --Helder
 Listen, I don't care if you're tired! Get back on that table and dance for the nice girl, Mommy needs the money! --kitty
 "Come on, honey; wake up and listen to mommy. Just a few more slugs, and your beer will be all gone..." --Badger
 After hours, employees like to relax and kick back in the staff lounge provided especially for their special needs. --Monsanto recruitment brochure, 2001 --Nyder
 "What? Oh, this. Sorry, honey. Meet my inner child." --Nyder
 It's the only way she'll learn honey. Now throw the water in her face and shout "No sleeping in church! Only people who hate Jesus sleep in church!" really loudly. --Hideo Spanner
 Hold on, I'm dividing a sister for you. --Bil's left nut
 "*sigh* Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, Mommy walks into mine." --Oy
 Remember kids, a stranger is just a friend you haven't met yet. --Necalan
 Uh, waiter, this isn't what I wanted when I ordered the "Beer & Brats" special... --Orrin Bloquy
 Wait a sec... The hell? This is not my child!! Who the fuck ARE you? Get off my lap!! --rudy
 "I'm sorry, but her blood tastes a little funny to me. Could I try the Swede 'n Sour instead?" --Helder
 ...and for just .25 cents a day you can feed a mall family of 3. --no1tono
 ...and on that cold and grey Chicago morn/another little soccer mom was born/in the Galleria..." --Coalcracker
 Spinnwebe for Kids! presents It's A Yucky Life. --Down10
 Dear Highlights: I'm a four year old from a small Midwestern town, and I never thought this would happen to me... --tieboy
 Look sweetie, it was a magic trick -- there are no more quarters in your ear. --Yakko
 I know, sweetie, I know; but mommy needs just one more sample for her parole officer... --Samwise (has NO ONE noticed the color of that stuff?)
 "Just a moment, dear. I'll feed on you next." --Torc.
 Unaware of the peril she was placing herself in, Katie curiously approached the two-headed mallbeast and offered it some of her smoothie. --James Howard
 Chez Pierrot welcomes diners with children... to a segregated alcove where they are served nothing but urine. --megafrim
 "Well, it's been 3 hours -- if Daddy doesn't come back this time, it's all your fault." --Fletch
 The Dos And Don'ts Of Dating: Do tell him you have children before your first date is over. Don't bring them to the motel room with you. --Helder
 "A blond haired girl on the lap of a mother brings open the gates of fortune, but if that child should urninate..." Kid Shui: The ancient Chinese Art of better living through strategic child placement --Mia Descandion

Back to the IADL Archive index
Back to It's A Dysfunctional Life