IADL #551
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 "Fastball...? no. Curve...? no. Low...?" --Wabewalker
 Joyous middle-class Americans decide what they'll do with their $180 share of the great tax cut. --Stefan Jones
 Mystery Science Theater 3000 didn't translate well to the Home and Garden channel. --Lloyd
 "Terminator III, Labor Day" --anon
 Ed ignored the knocking from the cooler. When he said two hours time out, he meant it. --Luther Yonderboy
 Slowly, slowly, Shamu made his way towards the can of Surge. --Awkward Boy
 I suppose we really should be getting these livers to the hospital... --Awkward Boy
 In the days before television. --Doctor X (Gary Larson, we hardly knew ye.)
 "Hey, Bob, could you pass me a...Bob, you got kneed in the nuts three years ago. Let it go. Literally." --Pete
 Damn, I can't believe we're related to them. Get me another beer. --Bil's Left Nut
 The 14th Annual Stare Down Sally competiton, Day 3. --Nyder
 Waiting for Godot..and hoping he brings more beer. --A GRRRouch
 The family reunion got a little confusing when it was revealed that because of an indescretion with a condom and a time machine, Marc, Sal and Wendy are all actually the same person. --crispy
 And then, for no discernible reason, they began humming the theme to "Bonanza." --Darren
 The Secret Service on casual Friday. --Riff (salv. Bibbo)
 Kmart enjoyed a 10 point gain the next Monday. --MrScary
 Things you would never, ever, EVER hear these people say, #38: "I just don't understand the appeal of Nascar." --deadcoil ("I just couldn;t find a thing at Wal-Mart today...")
 "I TOLD you 'Cops' was more fun live than on TV!" "Damn, he IS mean after that much Jim Beam" "Oooh, THAT'S gonna hurt in the morning!" --Fletch
 Terminators know they're cool. --Weasel
 Aunt Edna's seizures never failed to draw a crowd every Fourth of July. --The Living End
 The anticipation had lost its edge by the time Vanilla Ice finally took the stage. --megafrim
 "You can't breathe? Is it Breathless?" "Now he's turning purple. Is it The Color Purple?" "Wait, now he's clutching his throat and falling to the ground. What kind of clue is that? This game of charades sucks." --Helder
 "I dunno, I guess deep down in my heart I never really expected hazing to go out of fashion. Now what the hell are we supposed to do?" --Helder
 Although they'd been trying since childhood, the Murphy kids could never levitate Mrs. Cuthbert's house. They could sure make the old bitch uncomfortable, though. --megafrim
 Thanks to new Extra Strength Prozac, you can't tell who just had their baby stolen by a dingo. --Ken
 "Dad's on fire. Shouldn't we put him out?" "As soon as I finish my beer." --Helder
 "Shouldn't one of us ... I dunno ... have a job by now?" --Helder
 ...nice apartment complex... close-knit social circle... lovely day... cookin' out... Spinn, this actually seems like a rather functional life. --Phat Cheops
 "Man... can cats fuck, or what?" --K-Man

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