IADL #555
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 Up until the very end, it was one of the coolest Phish concert parking lots I'd ever chilled in. There were some cute bitties about, some smoking hack circles, bowls aplenty and seating for all. Then someone decided to break out those damn lawn darts. That was the last time I saw Billy alive. The scream he let out will haunt me 'til my dying day. On an up note, Trey did play a kick ass version of "Fee." --dALY
 And then, inevitably, the tornado hit. --Nyder
 The George Romero Family Picnic was pretty dull last year. Cousin Jethro, having been impaled with a flagpole through his skull earlier in the evening, idly sat waving next to Uncle Earl, who found himself a "noshin' leg". Meanwhile, the kids took turns gnawing on each others' shoulders. Yep, pretty much the same as last year... ---+=Hemlock "mrrruuuugggrrhh! BRAAAAINS!" Martini=+-
 By mid-December, the Florida recount had become a spectator sport. --Joe Z
 Five minutes later, Lenny realizes that Darleen is no longer in his lap. --megafrim
 Hey, Bill! Which picture do want this one to be? 555? Okay! --Weasel
 "These aren't the beers you're looking for..." --Lloyd
 Spinn finally gives us a picture of the squatters on his front lawn, waiting for more updates on the UPS thing. --Phat Cheops
 I'm this many.... --Jenn Dolari
 Chillin out at the 14th Annual Glove Puppet Convention. --Stoney Grounds
 Bob, fearing death from falling Mir, puts on his communism-proof hat. --The Unknown Anorak
 Jim accurately predicts how many beers it will take to get one of the girls drunk enough to sleep with him. --Helder
 Not only does the woman in green and blue look EXACTLY like my wife from behind, she also has that same ability to goad total strangers at other campsites into vehement arguments if they dare make a peep after 8 PM. Amazing. Honey, is that you? --rudy
 IQ? Shoe size? Beers consumed this hour? Degrees of ennui? Number of minutes before both he and the chair collapse into an immovable heap? Got me. --rudy
 It wasn't famous, and it wasn't government-controlled, but Area 52 still had some pretty strange inhabitants. --Nyder (salvaging Pog!)
 Barbecue parties in the Mirror Universe. --Nyder
 "Say, Kevin, y'ever seen a bear holding a digital camera?" --The Mad Puffin
 "Argh. Scary hand monster. So scram, kid." --Torc.
 Hey, Lurleen, wanna help me a Fred and Jody move the trailer a couple spaces down? We'll have a better view of the culver, and the skeeters won't be so bad! --Weasel
 Do not stare at the woman's wedgie, do not stare...oh NO!!! AHHHH!! --NLEE
 Here we see a winner of the next Darwin Awards getting ready for take-off. --Anastasia
 Following a three-hour coke, meths and marijuana bender, by the time Stan noticed something was amiss, the mosquito had began sucking out brainmatter. --Nyder (salvaging slibs)
 "Whas-*BURP*-sup?" Troy's evening will be ending before everyone else's once again... --Tillman
 "...and watch how high she jumps when I place this hand firmly upon her ass." --It's Claude!
 Oh my God! That's the guy who sat in front of me when I saw Hannibal! --McKinney
 "Hey Zeke, how many hours ya reckon it'll be 'fore Jeb gits done cookin' them hot dawgs?" --McKinney
 Bob, ever the realist, already knows what his sexual partner for the evening will be. --Torc.
 Budget constraints beging to reflect in Slobodan Milosovic's elite guard. --Torc.
 The US goverrnment attributed it to good strategy, but everyone knew that the key to America's Gulf War victory was laziness on the part of Iraqi forces. --UFO_Charlie
 "Oh Christ!" thought Leroy, "how in hell did Fox strap a video camera to a tornado? Oh well, least I'll be on tv" --slibs
 Although he managed to gather a few followers to his cult as he grew older, Linus was still bitterly disappointed every Halloween Eve when the Great Pumpkin failed to appear as predicted. --Helder
 Larry Ellison now regrets accepting all of pay as CEO of Oracle in stock options. --slibs
 "Hey, toss me that javelin." --Torc.
 By the time they got to the inauguration, the excitement and novelty had worn off. --Helder (salvaging Nyder)
 If you're slacking and you know it, raise your hand. --Yakko
 Australian sign language for "Toss me a goddamn beer!" --flodnak
 Randy's +4 Armor-Melting Fireball fails to materialize. Randy blames the "lite" beer. --James Howard
 Anybody who took pictures of Peter Parker in his older years got their camera webbed. --K-Man

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