Congressman Sheldon deftly slid his assistant Shelia's hand down the front of his pants. They thought they had managed to do this totally undetected, until Sheldon noticed the camara-crew from "Hard Copy". --kafka
The last photograph Eddie took before "Mad Tony" Solozzo gave him a 70mm-210mm zoom lens enema. --Rev.Oley
Sadly, Fred was unable to spot the sting operation before he approached the first "pro." --Darlin'
"Listen Sis, Mom and Dad don't suspect a thing. And if the desk clerk doesn't believe were old enough to be married, we can prove we have the same last name, and live at the same address. He'll have to believe us." --Blake
Whoah! When I wear these glasses, you're all UGLY! And that billboard just says "CONSUME"! --Mikael Behrens
Oh Yeah! Well I don't point out your shortcomings everytime we go to the Grand Canyon. --Monk n Treb
Listen, I know I said that I'd spring for a hotel room for your first time...but...ummm...I was kinda thinking Motel 6. --The Unmasked Revenger
So anyway, my sister's just walkin' down the street one day when all of a sudden this dude jumps out and shoots her picture with a QuickTake® camera. So, like, she doesn't think anything of it and then a couple of days later her boyfriend calls her and says he saw a picture of her on that World Wide Web thing, and some caption about her having a mouthful of semen, and -- hey, what's this guy doing? --zed
Exhibit "A": Mr. & Mrs Sean Penn, shown here on the morning of April 27, 1987, just before my client the photographer was injured, your honor. --Capt. phealy
"Come wit me if you wan to live."--Bargain basement Terminators. --Greg J
Uh, well hon, this monument commemerates the only tie in a Boston election. In 1732, Wesley Shoger defeated Thomas Jenkins by doing the funky chicken around a fire tower. --Keef
Sadly, this is the best photo our hidden camera was able to capture of Mixed-Doubles Dwarf Tossing --Paul Roub
Psst - lady...need a green card? --Boschcat of the Apocalypse
Honey, it's only a phallic symbol. You don't have to avert your eyes. --SpinnWebe
Did you hear a click? I thought I heard a click. It sounded like a shutter. --The Lawyer
Whoah-ho, Martha, them Sunblockers is cool! They DO make everything clearer, even the zits on your...uhhh...Martha? --Toade
Listen, honey, let me finish! "So yes, I'm a hip-hopper/Man, I love my BluBlockers!" Whaddya think? Am I cool or what? --Kurt S.
At last! The tourists finally finish their long pilgrimage to the shrine of Watt L Shaho, patron saint of cheap sunglasses. --U.V.Ray
I don't care if he is your husband, Alice. I'm gonna pop him if he doesn't stop following us. --Bette G.
Fred and his dyslexic girlfriend pose for the camera. --anon