IADL #60
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 Noonian Soong's infertile sister Majel takes a poke at cybernetics herself... --Doc Evil
 Amazed at how aggressive Jehovah's witnesses are becoming, Lita removes the Watchtower. --Greg J
 Oh, good, it's "Small Wonder," the lost episode. --anon
 Now at K-Mart for twenty-nine ninety-five, it's the "Instant Mother" kit! Some assembly is required, however... --anon
 Tonight, the "Full House" you all wanted to see, where Michelle is strangled with her own intestines. --Thomas Wilde
 I'm not gonna get up from this computer until I figure out exactly where the righteous fuck this kid's head went. --Thomas Wilde
 Little Conchita soon regretted the decision to play "Reservoir Dogs" with her mom. --Retard
 Listen, I don't want to hear any more complaints about your new dress, or you're gonna get it. You hear me, Norman? --Greg J
 Braaaains! --Greg J
 Where the hell do you put the batteries in this thing? --Riff
 WHOOA-OOH!! Eyeball popped out again, honey. Lemme pop it back in for ya... --Doc Evil
 The earwig was lost forever. This time the "Wrath of Khan" game had gone too far. --I AM DAMO SUZUKI
 Preparing for her deportation hearing, Rosalita sets the child to detonate in eight minutes. --The Turtle
 This photo obviously disproves Male Myth #17: that only guys give 'noogies.' --Emil Blovin
 With only breast-feeding captions coming to mind, the wanna-be IADL writer instead opts to go get a beer --Emil Blovin
 Christopher Reeves' neck was broken right about here, and if you don't get your teeth off of my tit, yours will be, too. --The Lawyer
 Charlene hopes the doctor has found a suitable head donor for her suffering daughter. --LivFre
 ..hold still now, Susan.. you're head's on backwards in a BAD way this time, honey. --LivFre
 Even if I have to pry it out of you with this shoehorn, you're giving me back my blue M&M! --LivFre
 "What a barg... this dress isn't my size! THIS DRESS ISN'T MY SIZE! DAMN! --ThreeSwords Delamitri
 "Funny... there was a child in this dress a minute ago..." --ThreeSwords Delamitri
 Sally wonders how she can possibly fit into her new "Rocky Horror Picrture Show" outfit. --ThreeSwords Delamitri
 "Huh. The tag in this dress reads, 'Do not look in this dress under penalty of law.' Good grief. Who the hell will ever know?" --ThreeSwords Delamitri
 It didn't work. You're still ugly as hell. --Cheezo
 Little girls sure do make good pogo-sticks! --Cheezo
 Urethrea and her unfortunate daughter Kasmella caught in an endless Lather, Rinse, Repeat cycle... --The Sandman
 It was this hidden video camera's footage of Jennifer crushing little girls skulls between her forearms that convicted her. --Anonywuss
 Wanda was "let go" because The Happy Times Day Care Center didn't see the advantage of force feeding the children cyanide over quiet time as a disciplinary action. --Anonywuss
 The see-through dressing rooms did attract more people, but less customers. --Coyote
 A proud Phillipino mom prepares her daughter for her mail order wedding. --Coyote
 Headlice warning signs #4: Nit-picking mothers. --ChoppingBlock
 Maria believes that no matter where you are or what you're doing, it's never a bad time to check your child for ticks. --Adam Cadre
 "Quit your whining - lobotomies hardly hurt at all! Well, for me, anyway." --anon
 Motherly smothering is one thing, but mother engulfing is just plain wrong! --Don Spudleone
 Stop fussing! We must make you look pretty for Mr. Kennedy.... --Don Spudleone
 It's the new phase of Elvis Presley's life -- the pantless effeminate. --Don Spudleone

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