IADL #64
(some picture)  (<<)  (<)  (>)  (>>)
  (?)    '?'

 WOW! I wish * I * could take pictures while I run at 78mph --Doc Evil
 (b-boom-chh, boom-ch-boom-b-boom) Yo, we here, just checkin' out the place (boom-ch-b-boom-b-b) Comin fo' you, gonn' sit on yo face! (da-b-b-boom-ch-boom-ch-ch-boom-bb-da) (That's right, we bad, we bad, ain't we, T?) --LivFre
 The Dairy Queen and the Dairy Handmaid make a suprise visit to their unsuspecting subjects. --Retard
 "I dunno, Jan...I've got this strange feeling in my stomach ever since we ate that poor girl in aisle six...." --Steve Cossey
 As Luke raced down the trench towards the exhaust port, he was greated by the Empire's truly horrifying last line of defense. --Alexander Shearer
 Next in our "If TV Stars Lived In Real Life" series: Cagney & Lacey, doing a little after-hours cracking down on the Haagen-Daz. --Thomas Wilde
 Having brutally beaten and sodomized Mr. Wipple, the surprisingly unruffled duo make their exit. --Ngoc van Trimble
 Betty and Barbara, tired from the hunt, fell long asleep -- only to awaken within NIRVANA! --Don Spudleone
 After hours, the supermarket released armies of undead for protection of theft. --Don Spudleone
 Yes, that's right. It's the Sta-Puft Marshmallow Woman. And I see she brought her lesbian lover, the Disgruntled Red Giant! --Don Spudleone
 Spontaneous CanCan dancing, while odd, was a regular occurence with Frita and Darlene. --Coyote
 Tough, dedicated, quick to act and well-trained in the martial arts, supermarket bouncers were both respected and feared. --Coyote
 Aieeee! Healthy Choice frozen dinners! Run! Run! --Emil Blovin
 Next on 'Wild Kingdom': suburban housewives tracking in its native habitat one of their most elusive prey species--the Dove Bar. --The Outsider
 Mmmm. Food sure tastes better when you don't pay. --Cheezo
 That's right. Go ahead and crawl. We busted up your glasses and now we're going to bust up you. --ChoppingBlock
 Finally sick of this "Dysfunctional Life" shit, Jenny bounces a box of frozen potatoes off the photographer's head. --Conroy
 "You know, Elisa, there's something about that guy lying down on the aisle with a camera... I don't know what, but it seems weird, you know?" --ThreeSwords Delamitri
 FBI slide #A04Q: 0.037 seconds before the frozen food enacted vengeance. Victims were very cold afterwards. --ThreeSwords Delamitri
 ... and you thought the potato chip aisle was cool! --Riff
 Ben & Jerry's wives Ann & Frieta sample the competition. --Riff
 I told you I was prepared! As long as the generator holds, we'll be able to live in this bomb shelter for years! --Riff
 It's no great trick to tell which of these ladies just sampled the new Olestra Twizzles... --The Sandman
 We're the women of the DFL! We think fuzzy photos are oh so swell! We are hired at MacDonalds, but work at Burger King; After work we don men's clothing, and mall shop while we sing! --not elsie or the lumberjack
 Overheard by Janet Jackson in a posh Bel Air supermarket: "Michael, I know it's been gradual, but you've changed..." --ChoppingBlock
 "So the manager says, 'I'll give you a raise when hell freezes over!' That's when I locked her in the meat locker. Ha ha ha ha!" --ThreeSwords Delamitri
 Marla should have thought of a better robbery than to steal all of the store's tobasco sauce by ingestion. --ThreeSwords Delamitri
 Grossly over budget, the supermarket is forced to use these girls singing instead of musak. --ThreeSwords Delamitri
 This was the last shot taken by the man, who is currently listed in stable condition at County Memorial. Next time he'll know better than to stand between the sample table and the local white trash when a new box of Dove Bars is cracked open. --anon
 Whatever you do, stay calm. They can smell fear. --anon
 Rethinking the old "driving-over-a-cliff" routine, Thelma and Louise decide instead to knock down a couple of gallons of Haagen-Daz. --anon
 Okay, kids, we know that Heather has two mommies. Can you point to the one who is "butch"? Can you point to the one who is the "femme"? Very good! --The Sesame Street "Rejected Ideas" Files
 So then he says,... What the hell is a transsexual? --BrickBat
 ...and you thought only men were hoggish enough to laugh about letting gaggingly horrible farts in public places --BrickBat
 Their families didn't understand why James and Katie had to be married in the Frozen Foods aisle, but their love would conquer all. --Anonywuss
 Kirk and Emily were upset when this footage of their dance scene for "Been Caught Stealin'" wound up on the cuttin room floor. --Anonywuss

Back to the IADL Archive index
Back to It's A Dysfunctional Life