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 After Santa dumped Mrs. Claus (and his facial hair), he and Herbie, the head elf, headed to Hollywood to personally check the "naughty" list. --The Unmasked Revenger
 I'm so glad all you assholes are getting a bunch of laughs at our expense. Just remember, next time it could be you in one of these pictures. --Frank and Earl
 Wow, Pete, I know I told you to sneak the "Jiffy-Pop" out under your shirt, but popping it first was pure genius!" --Capt. phealy
 Earl continued to relate his anecdote, but all Jerry's attention was focused on Gozilla moving slowly toward them. --Blake
 "Now take that one in red, for example. I would be willing to give her a go if she would just dress a little nicer, and maybe lose five pounds." --Blake
 Freemen Special Agents, Leeroy "Gutmuscle" McCray and Billybob "Stench" Pile, conducting surveylance during Operation:PIZZAHUT. Their mission, should they chose to accept it, is to coordinate their philosophy and constitution so that All-you-kin-eat-night lawfully means All-you-kin-haul from the local 'HUT. --anon
 "Huh, huh, huh. Hey, Beavis, do you remember when we were in high school and we had our own show?" "Yeah, heh, heh, you said 'high'!" --Greg J
 In this rare scene, Elvis Presley and Jim Morrison reminisce about the glory days before their staged demises. --Greg J
 ...but tragedies like these can be prevented, for as little as 1 dollar a day. Please, won't you try to make a difference... --Greg J
 You know Specs, this Fisher Price Pocket Explorer is keeping me soaked to my skivvies. --Monk n Treb
 Fuckin Amish. Always racing their buggies up & down the Street throwin their clay bunnies at everyone. I tell ya Popeye it ain't right. --Monk n Treb
 Hold me, Bob. --John Gruber
 Skipper (Alan Hale, Jr.) and Gilligan (Bob Denver), in a reflective moment during the taping of "Gilligan's Island XXIV: Island of the Alive". (NOTE: They *still* don't get to fuck Ginger and Mary Ann. Or even Mrs. Howell.) --Kurt S.
 After Gallo Wineries dropped the wine cooler commercials, Bartle and Jaymes' lives soon spiralled downhill. --The Unmasked Revenger
 After the drunken bash at Ted Kennedy's place, Rush Limbaugh and Alan Cranston realize that they grabbed the the wrong clothes. --The Unmasked Revenger
 Ernest Borgnine and Kevin Spacey rest between scenes on the set of this summer's most eagerly awaited sequel, Boyz in the Hood 2: The Caucasian Connection. --zed
 It's one of the perennial hazards of using America Online® -- Ted (right) finally meets face to face with Greta (left), the sassy, sexy twenty-something with whom he's been getting hot and heavy in private rooms for the past three months, only to discover that Greta may have withheld certain fairly crucial facts. First off, she is not a redhead. --zed
 Yeah, Ralph, this is the life...we're young, we're single, we're pretty darn good-lookin'...all there is to do now is sit back and wait for the chicks to roll in...who am I kidding? We look like the Maytag repairman's illegitimate sons! Christ, what are we DOING out here? Let's go back home, and have Mom fix us an extra dose of Dad's pain medicine... --Kurt S.
 Fred And Joe pose for a picture outside the bar. Call 555-3245 for more photos and send check or money order for the video tape of them Nude Jello wrestling. --LORD KAS
 Yeah, IBM helped us get a T3 into the double-wide. Now I kin watch the worldwide fertilizer markets in real-time -- that extra li'l jump on the comp'tition sure helps. It damn well is a small planet. --Paul Roub
 Naw, I'm not going to go out and buy a bikini until I'm at least a 'c' cup. --Boschcat of the Apocalypse
 Herb and Norm: Male Prostitutes for the Geritol Generation. --Toade
 Steve, your shoes need shining. Of course, you'll have to take my word for it. --His Imperial Majesty
 Hey, babe! Double your pleasure! --Ted the Fed
 The old man looked at the genetic misfit and thought: "He shore is purty!" --D.N.Eh?
 Shucks Clem, you 'spect me to believe yous is carry'n my youngin? --kafka
 Gort! Klaatu barada nikto! --ZooBoy
 Roger was pleased that Ralph successfully shop-lifted the watermelon for their picnic. --Meli O'Girl
 The stuntmen for "Deliverance" take a break. --N.Bred

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