You want the game? YOU CAN’T HANDLE THE GAME
Holy Christ, man. This following bit is from Squidi…and really I just can’t be bothered to explain who he is or why I care. I’m quoting this because he’s learned not to keep his text archived for long, because it’d be too easy to find previous writings where he’s contradicted himself, or had such mind-bogglingly self-absorbed comments like the ones following that they’re fun to link to and point at him.
Here, he’s talking about scalpers who resold the Wii for tremendous profits. If you don’t have the context to know who Squidi is, then just appreciate that there are people in the world who actually think like this.
Sometimes, I’m ashamed to be a gamer. It honestly seems like I’m the only one who deserves to play videogames. When I do it, it is for righteous and intellectual reasons - to study, to understand, to appreciate. It seems like other people just fuck around until they get bored. It’s why I won’t buy used games (above and beyond being a hypocrite). How can anybody who deserves to play videogames lose the cases and manuals, or have discs with more scratches than a hard wood floor after a roller derby? There’s no respect there. No honesty. Just use and abuse.
I don’t tend to hang out with typical gamers all that much. Frankly, I try to avoid them for exactly this reason. It’s hard to not feel superior to them when they pride themselves on being shallow and ugly. So, occasionally, I forget the ugliness that is out there. I don’t play online. I don’t get cursed out by 12 year olds, or see people’s butts through their Xbox Live camera, or deal with spawn campers, or any of that behavior that only makes sense if you are selfish and stupid.
Scalpers are a problem beyond just being selfish and stupid, but it’s the same cause. It’s not just greed, but also low self esteem. To need to exploit someone just so that there is someone out there that you are superior to. A lot of people say I’m arrogant, and I do not even remotely disagree, but I’ll say it again. My arrogance is better than that. It’s like super arrogance. It’s got so much pride, it won’t even be associated with the pride of idiots and losers.
Oh, and P.S.: as you know by now, the OJ book was cancelled, along with the FOX interview. I wonder if he’ll have an interview on the CW called If I Still Had An Interview On FOX, Here’s How I Would’ve Done It.
November 21st, 2006 13:16
For some reason, I’m reminded of the following quote:
“This makes masturbation look like a spiritual quest.” –Bill Hicks
(oh no, now I’m being shallow and ugly)
November 21st, 2006 15:12
It reminds me of the media-obsessed basement-dwelling adolescents so often made fun of on Robot Chicken. “Dear assfaces…”
November 21st, 2006 16:05
“It honestly seems like I’m the only one who deserves to play videogames. When I do it, it is for righteous and intellectual reasons - to study, to understand, to appreciate. It seems like other people just fuck around until they get bored.”
Wow, that’s so revealing and fucked up! It’s like someone crystallized Essence of Fucked Up and made it into one of those hippie salt lamps.
November 21st, 2006 19:17
Wow. A man with his head that far up his ass could perform a self-colonoscopy without the use of tools.
November 22nd, 2006 05:32
Wow. I wish I had super arrogance.
November 22nd, 2006 11:00
Not only is he arrogant, but he’s arrogant about his arrogance. It’s almost Zen, except for the part about being arrogant.
November 22nd, 2006 13:02
%LT;voice style=”John Houseman”%gt;Squidi. We get frags the old-fashioned way. We earn them.
November 22nd, 2006 15:41
Awww, the scalpers just have poor self esteem and not enough ego/arrogance.
I’m sure they can use their profits to buy some arrogance.
November 23rd, 2006 23:59
A guy with a shitty web comic and a petulant, condescending attitude who writes about “[videogaming as an intellectual pursuit]” giving a lecture about self-esteem on the internet. Nope, you were wrong, Spinn, irony’s alive and well.
I’m not a fan of the whole “scalping consoles” thing either, but, uh… I strongly question his psychoanalysis. Yeah, Squidi, people only sell things in ways that fuck over other people because of poor self-esteem. Nothing to do with, erm, greed, money, or any of that silly “rational explanation” garbage.
Also, seconding Drusilla.
November 24th, 2006 02:02
I heard arrogance is going cheap now. Ten bucks per ml.
November 27th, 2006 12:45
This guy sounds like he was beaten up every day in high school. And if he wasn’t, it’s a damn shame.
November 28th, 2006 11:14
In the indirect words of Bil Watterson, “Adjectives fail me.”
December 15th, 2006 14:56
Yes, fie on Squidi for admitting his contempt of lazy gamers! Certainly we should compare the years of comics he gave us to excrement, and imply that he deserved to be abused as a kid!
Come on. I don’t think Squidi is as “arrogant” as he claims to be. He’s painfully blunt, but I think he has good points. He’s a former game developer, so he’s likely to have some idea what he’s talking about. Is it so wrong to think of gaming as more than mindless entertainment? Is that too “elitist” for you? Then go play in the swingset, kid, the grown-ups are talking.
December 15th, 2006 16:14
snkkt. Did you even read the same post I did?
No, it’s not wrong to think about gaming as more than mindless entertainment. If that’s what his post said, I’d have no problem with it. What he did say is that he feels superiority to those who do, and that he’s the only one who deserves to play video games. I probably can’t go on the swingset either, because I couldn’t possibly appreciate them on all the levels that Squidi could.
December 15th, 2006 16:23
Actually, as a point of order, he worked as a game developer for a period lasting *weeks*, and has done nothing in the industry since.
He’s a bloody tool.
December 16th, 2006 02:03
Which, you know, is a pretty rare thing online, so it’s important to study him really, really closely.